30 Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You out ...

By Sheila

30 Ways to Get a Guy to Ask You out ...

If you wonder whether there are ways to get a guy to ask you out, the answer is, yeah! In fact, there are quite a few effective ones! So if you like this guy, call it a crush, butterflies in your stomach or love at first sight, you can easily get HIM to like YOU enough to ask you out! Of course there is no unique surefire formula, as all guys are different and so are the circumstances, but do not despair! These are 30 different ways to get a guy to ask you out that will work. If you try any or all of these awesome ways to get a guy to ask you out, trusty Cupid will do the rest!

UPD: Given the sheer volume of comments here, we've carved out a space on Reddit for this topic. Join us there for a more organized and moderated discussion.

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Be You

No one likes deception. Think about it. If a guy was extremely gentlemanly on the first date (opened doors for you, pulled your chair out, etc...) and all of that magically disappeared when the two of you got a little more serious, you would feel cheated right? So don't do the same thing. Yes, we all tweak our normal selves to impress the other person, but there is a fine line between tweaking and being downright fake. So listen to him when he talks about his favorite sport but don't pretend to be a born fan just to get him to like you and ask you out. This is definitely one of the top ways to get a guy to ask you out!


Dress as You Normally Would

Don't dress a certain way because you think that's what he would like. That's a sure-shot sign that you are trying too hard, especially on a first date. When I was 15, I had the biggest crush on this guy and I knew for a fact that his ex always had her face plastered with makeup. If he liked her that way, surely he would like me with a little blue eye shadow? I never found out because the one and only time I experimented with it, my best friend (thankfully) caught me before anyone else could see me and made me swear I would NEVER do that to my face again. I can't imagine what would have happened otherwise. I probably should have read these makeup tips for a successful first date. Moral of the story: If you are uncomfortable with very short skirts, high heels and dramatic make-up, steer clear of them. Try and figure out what works best for you and rock that with confidence!


Accentuate Your Best Physical Features

There are some things you can wear and then some clothes that you should just not wear especially on a first date. Fashion trends are going to be the death of us one day! Don't follow them just to get a guy to ask you out because in the bargain, you might be highly uncomfortable and that's not the best thing for your confidence. Instead, figure out what suits your body and find ways to accentuate your best features. Draw attention to your killer legs, wear colors that bring out your gorgeous eyes, wear a belt to emphasize the curves of your waist, you get the point. Just remember that learning what looks good on you is a process. You may goof up every now and then but that's okay. Just be comfortable and enjoy the process!


Don't Be Fake

While cultivating the same interests as the boy you like is great, you can't fake it. As you've already read, one of the most important ways to get a guy to ask you out is to, above all, be yourself. So, faking an interest in football or pretending you're also wild about video games isn't the best idea. You can be interested in them – and interested in HIS interest – but don't fake it yourself. That could come back to bite you in the butt later.


Eye Contact

Eye contact really is a great thing. You can say so much with your eyes – like telling him you're interested. Whenever possible – again, without being too obvious – try to catch and hold his eyes. If you catch him staring at you, that's even better. Capture his eyes when you do, and smile at him. He'll definitely know you're interested too, and that may make it easier for him to approach you.

Famous Quotes

Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.

Bruce Lee

Flash a Smile

One of the most powerful weapons we have to melt a guy like silly putty is a beautiful smile! So whenever you bump into him, use your pearlies and use them well! There's no easier way to show a guy that you are friendly, approachable and most importantly, interested in him! Also, when you catch that eye contact, don't just stare, flash him a smile.


Be Clear

It's hard trying to figure out what another person's thinking, so if you want a guy to ask you out, make sure you're sending out crystal clear signals. You don't have to publicly declare your love for him or anything but make him feel special by flirting with him and treating him differently than you do other guys. Sit near him, flirt with him, touch him a little and even play the game of favorites with him when he's around.



One of the most important ways to get a guy to ask you out is to find a way to show him subtly that you are available and very much single. Try and weave it into general banter. That's what I do. Also, this would be the perfect way to find out if he's single or no. If the coast is clear, yay you!


The article provides 30 helpful tips on how to get a guy to ask you out. These tips range from scheduling regular interactions, to finding subtle ways to show that you are available, to finding out if the guy is single. The article also provides helpful links to other articles on the site, such as ways to show subtly that you are available and ways to find out if the guy is single. With these tips, you can increase your chances of getting a guy to ask you out.


Take the Initiative

Shrinking coy violets rarely get noticed. So if you like a guy and you want attention from him, stop waiting and praying and take that first step...no matter how scary! The next time you see him walk by, flash a lovely smile and say hi. You can't possibly go wrong with that! Here are some other ways to take initiative without scaring him off. Confidence is enamoring and sometimes, you might need to push yourself to take that first step but it's so worth it! These tips to show you are interested in him without being too clingy are sure to come handy.


Be Approachable

By that, I naturally don't mean you should be easy. You shouldn't throw yourself at him, either. What I mean is that you should make sure he's in the kind of position where he'll feel comfortable asking you for a day. The wrong way to get a guy to ask you out is to constantly be surrounded by a group of friends. That might make him feel really uncomfortable, so make sure you have private moments together without making it too obvious.


Common Ground

There are certain specific things most men love talking about: cars, sports, action movies to name a few. Find out what his likes and dislikes are and try to steer the conversation in that direction. And like I said earlier, don't pretend to be a fan of something just because you think it'll get him to ask you out. At the same time, don't shoot down his interests by saying something like "I HATE sports." Seem genuinely interested and listen to what he has to say. And if you really hate something he likes, try to playfully argue with him. That will bring you closer. Remember the keyword: playfully!


Seize Every Moment Together with Him

I know that sounds a little vague, but really, ladies, carpe diem. Don't let fear hold you back! Guys like outgoing girls. I don't mean be obnoxious and in everyone's face – I know we all hate THAT girl. I mean, don't let fear rule you. If you're at a karaoke bar, rock it out. Remember that life is a series of opportunities, so don't let a single one pass you by when you're trying to get the guy you like to ask you on a date.


Be Witty

You've heard it said that guys love a girl who can make them laugh, right? More often than not, that's entirely true and that's what makes this one of the ways to get a guy to ask you out. If you've got a sense of humor, don't be afraid to show it off! Better, be witty, because that takes both intelligence and humor, and there's nothing sexier than that!


Don't Get Friend-Zoned

A lot of girls try to be a guy's friend first, and that's a great idea – theoretically. The thing is, you have to be careful when you do this. Great relationships form when you're friends first, but you don't want to get trapped in the friend zone. He has to see you as a girl, too, not just one of the guys. Otherwise, it might never occur to him to go out with you, and that's definitely not what you want. You can find the balance by never letting him forget you have a feminine side while still coming off as the girl with all the cool points.


Leave Your Friends out of It

Many so-called relationship experts will tell you to get your friends involved in letting him know you like him; they tout that as an excellent way to get a guy to ask you out. I patently disagree. This approach can be way too childish, and might turn him off. If your friends can be subtle and feel him out a little, to see where his thoughts lay, that's one thing. If they're going to be all, “Oh em gee, our friend totally likes you, do you like her??” then definitely don't let them take that approach.


Act on It

You took the initiative and used flirting tips to make him notice you and it worked! You and your crush are now talking to each other and now you want ways to increase sexual tension between you and your crush. Here's what you need to do. Glance at him often and if he catches you looking, smile. When the two of you are talking, look right into his eyes, listen to what he says and laugh at his jokes. Twirl your hair. And please make it look playful as opposed to forced. Brush your shoulder or arm against his every now and then. Actions do speak louder than words and you should take a moment to read about these body language signs of flirting. All this will make him realize that you are very interested in him.


Find Excuses to Hang out with Him

I have seen a lot of comments from readers who want a guy to ask them out when they've barely even interacted with him. That's not how it works girls! You need to get to know him and give him a chance to get to know you. Hang back after class, ask him to help you out with homework (even if you don't need it), ask him to teach you how to play a musical instrument (if he does play one), the excuses are endless and any will do!



This is another one of those occasions where you have to be careful, but as long as you know how to find that fine balance, you're all good! Flirting with a guy – following other tips mentioned, like maintaining eye contact, finding subtle and innocent ways to touch him, and so on – is an excellent way to get a guy to ask you out. Just don't go overboard, because you can come off desperate, and that will turn off a guy very fast.



You love it when your friends and dates listen to you, right? Well, he does too! Listening does more than let him know you're interested, though. It will also allow you to pick up subtle clues and hints about what he's feeling, and that might clue you into a better approach to entice him.


Don't Talk about Yourself Too Much

I know a lot of girls who think the perfect way to get a guy to ask you out is to tell him every single thing about yourself. That is not a good idea. If he mentions liking a restaurant, you can say you like it too – but don't “regale” him with anecdotes and stories from every visit you've ever made to the place. That's not giving him a hint; that's hitting him over the head with a heavy brick of information. Keep some of the mystery – let him find out about you at his own pace!


Stay on Topic

You've done everything you've had to do. The flirting is on full swing. You've probably also used these tried and tested punch lines for getting asked out. Now all he has to do is actually ask you out to one of these best places for a successful first date. Some guys are smarter and will usually ask you out by this point. Others need a few more hints. So what I do is discuss stuff like upcoming concerts, new movies and restaurants that I can't wait to check out. Sound excited without sounding too desperate and you never know, an invitation may just be a breath away. When you do get to that first date, remember that certain topics are just off limits. Here are some things not to discuss on a first date. Also, read our post on little known conversational tips for a successful date.


Stop at a High Point

What I mean by this is when you are having a conversation with him and you feel like it is dwindling or that you may be running out of things to say, find a believable excuse to say goodbye and cut it short. I know it's the last thing you want to do but trust me this way, he'll look forward to your next meeting. The idea is to leave him wanting more of you. This is one of the more cleverer ways to get a guy to ask you out.


Position Yourself Cleverly

If the two of you are about to spend a decent amount of time together, just remember to keep changing your position often enough without seeming too fidgety (These ways to calm the nerves before the first date will come in handy). Face to face interaction usually means maximum eye contact and that will help you connect better. But sticking to his side, especially in a crowded room would mean being able to be closer to him physically. Remember to lean into him and talk softly. It's all about clever and timely positioning. And like I said, don't do it too often or you might get asked "Do you wanna use the restroom?" like I did!


Have Fun

If you are with another group of 7 People You Need in Your Circle of Friends, concentrate on them instead of having one eye on him constantly. Don't spend your entire time watching his every move like a hawk or you're going to seriously spook him out. Instead, enjoy yourself with your own friends. Get them laughing or talking animatedly to you. This will make him wish he was with your crowd, especially with you. And if he happens to walk by, a warm smile and a hi would be perfect. And what if you are in a group with him? Well, read these ways to behave with your crush when you are in a group. I promise they'll help.


Make Him Feel Great

How you make a guy feel is probably the most important factor in getting him to fall for you and eventually ask you out. Remember, flattery will get you everywhere. Believe it or not, men love compliments as much as we do. So don't hesitate to tell him that he has an adorable smile or that you love his shoes or the cologne he's wearing. As always, remember not to go overboard with compliments or you will come across as fake. Also, be there for him and be nice to him. It will make him want to spend more time with you.


Be Confident

How can you expect a guy to fall for you if you don't love yourself? Confidence is one of the most attractive features about someone and when you are comfortable in your own skin, it shows! Just remember that you are wonderful and unique and that no one is perfect. Of course, be careful not to cross that thin line between confidence and cockiness.


Have a Sense of Humor

Nobody wants to date a grumpy grandma. Of course, you don't have to have a smile plastered on your face 24/7 but it's nice to be around someone who is cheerful and will laugh at your jokes (or tell him off playfully if you don't find them funny) and most importantly be able to see the funny side of difficult and embarrassing situations. Remember, "if you can't laugh at yourself, life's gonna seem a whole lot longer than you like."


Don't Be Obsessive

I know that you think you're in love with him and that he's the one but no matter how intense your feelings, don't give in to any stalker tendencies you might have. Don't text him constantly, don't call him all the time, don't "accidentally" land up where he hangs out or wait for him outside his class everyday. I assure you that there's no faster way to send a guy running in the opposite direction. All men need and appreciate a little space!


Be Patient

"My mama said 'you can't hurry love'" and it's so true! I know you can't wait to get into a relationship with him but nothing kills a budding love story like impatience. You've done your bit and put your heart out there and now you need to be patient. Give him his space and time to figure out how he feels about you. I'm not saying you have to wait a lifetime but let things progress naturally. The results are far sweeter that way too...


Don't Take Rejection Personally

I know this seems like a morbid tip in a post of ways to get a guy to ask you out but there is a little chance this might happen and I think it's very important to not take rejection to heart. If you've tried everything and he doesn't seem to respond or has turned you down, understand that at the end of the day you can't force feelings onto someone. He either does or doesn't feel the same way you do and the important thing is you tried. So move on and remember there are plenty of fish (some better) in the sea.

Follow these 30 ways to get a guy to ask you out and I'm certain he will ask you out in a flash! Personally I believe that if the two of you have a great time together but he won't make the first move, just ask him out yourself. When you have this list of places for a date he cannot say not to, you'll feel more confident. If you have more tips on how to get a boyfriend or how to get a guy to ask you out, please share! I can't wait to hear from you!

Heads up: If you've got more to say or are curious about what others think, this Reddit thread is the perfect spot. Let's keep this dialogue going!

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So there's this guy that I really really like (perhaps a bit too much for my own good) for a year now. I confessed a long time ago and since then we'd gotten closer although I did get rejected..twice... Soa few months ago he confessed to me, imagine my surprise when he showed very little hints of that, but said he wants to stay friends. Permanently. *heartbreak sound* Although I asked him why, all the answers i got were vague and doesn't make sense to me like "friendship lasts forever", "i don't want to be awkward if we break up", and things like that. Although he wants to stay friends, he still agreed to a date and even asked me to one(he cancelled though due to school). Now i have completely no idea where we are, although i'm pretty sure that he still likes me and i don't know if i should confront him about this because i don't really want to ask him out again before we actually go on a date he asks me to and i'm deathly afraid of being heartbroken again. Please, any adivce could help :( but i don't want to act as if i don't care because i do care!

I'm falling for one of the popular guys at school and we've known each other for a year when I walk down the hall occasionally say hi, but I wanna ask him out but Im scared that he will laugh and tell his friends, what should I do?

This message is going to sound exactly like everyone else's, but I really need advice so here goes: I'm friends with this really smart, funny guy and we have a great time together and we have lots of things in common. Many people have said that we would make a great couple and that he likes me. But, he's also best friends with this other girl, who everyone says he likes and also this third girl who he talks to frequently. Anyway, the point is, how do I know which of us he really likes. Please, I need specific advice, I've liked him for years and it hurts to see him with other girls.