Have you ever been on the perfect first date, with the most gorgeous man, and it goes so well and you go home perfectly content and then... he doesn’t call you back? I’ve spend endless nights analyzing what friends ‘did wrong’ to not get that call back, and sometimes it appears everything went so perfectly well, I have absolutely no idea what went wrong! So what can you do to ensure a second date, and more? Here are my top ten tips!
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Let Him Be a Man!
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Men like to make the first move. Sure, some might be slow, and some don’t ever get the hint until you make your point really obvious, but he is the man, and usually the men like to be in control. There's no harm in suggesting an idea for the date, but if you think he'd be more comfortable with his pick, go with it. Recent studies show that most failed relationships are initiated by women. I don't know how much truth there is to that but I don't see the harm in letting him take the lead.
Be Interested!
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Don’t wonder about what’s happening in Corrie, about what your friend is doing or about what you’ve got in the freezer. That's one first date mistake you should totally avoid. Your mind should be completely on who you are with. Listen to him, and I mean really listen to him. If you can reuse information that he's told you, such as names or incidents or carry on a discussion about something he mentioned instead of just nodding along, he will be impressed! Bottom line: Make him feel significant.
Frequently asked questions
Be Friendly!
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You’d be surprised at how many similar stories I’ve heard from friends who’ve been on dates recently. From women who glare at any other females in the area to those who wince whenever he mentions a female name, be it his mum or sister, being possessive isn’t attractive! We've all had to deal with that jealous boyfriendin the past and you know how annoying it can be. So don't put someone else throught it especially on the first date! Be friendly and open minded. It is an attractive quality to possess.
Let Him Pay!
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You might be gorgeous and self confident with a fatfashionable wallet but if he offers to pay, let him. Men aren’t stupid, and if they wanted you to pay half, they wouldn’t suggest paying it all. Be gracious and thankful, and let him pay. It doesn’t mean you owe him anything, and it isn’t sexist. It’s just a nice gesture to say thank you for spending the evening with him!
You might be gorgeous and self confident with a fat fashionable wallet but if he offers to pay, let him. Men aren’t stupid, and if they wanted you to pay half, they wouldn’t suggest paying it all. Be gracious and thankful, and let him pay. It doesn’t mean you owe him anything, and it isn’t sexist. It’s just a nice gesture to say thank you for spending the evening with him!
Additionally, accepting his offer can make him feel appreciated and respected, enhancing his overall experience and potentially increasing the likelihood of that desired second date.
Give Him Your Number!
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While all the magazines tell you to take his number and call him, I’m a big fan of the ‘letting him call you’ approach. He’ll call when he’s free, ready to talk and interested, and you’ll have his undivided attention. Until then, have fun with your hobbies, friends and lives. Let him take the lead, and he’ll love the chase. Also, it'll save you the whole "Should I call him now? Will I look stupid? Will I look psycho?" discussions you might have with yourself.
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Arrange Dates!
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A first date is enough pressure as it is without him needing the added pressure of organising the whole thing. So don't be afraid to make suggestions about places or things you could do. Even if he doesn't actually take you up on it, he will appreciate the fact that you cared enough to suggest stuff. An added tip, make sure there are atleast two days between THE call and your actual date. It will ensure that you don't seem too desperate and will give him time to miss you and give you time to pick up a sexy dress for the date.
No Sex!
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No sex on the first date. Simple. It doesn’t matter how close you feel, how drunk you are or how long it’s been. Promise yourself that you will not try to seduce him. Kisses and cuddles are close enough, and anything else will lead him to think you are easy. He might promise he won’t, but how is he supposed to stop himself from wondering if you ‘get close’ to every guy? Be a lady! Plus men love the chase. So don't give it up too easy or he will have nothing to look forward to.
This paragraph emphasizes the importance of not engaging in sexual activity on the first date. It advises women to refrain from trying to seduce their date and to instead focus on building a connection through kisses and cuddles. The author also mentions that giving in too easily may lead the man to question if the woman does this with every guy, which could potentially harm the chances of a second date. This advice is based on the belief that men enjoy the chase and appreciate a woman who maintains her boundaries.
Treat Him Right!
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You might have different opinions on critical matters, or end up debating something you feel strongly about, but make sure you are respectful and ladylike. Instigating a fight on the first date is a definite dating blooper. Treat everyone around you with respect, as well. Saying please and thank you to barmen and waitresses isn’t only polite, it’ll show him you’re nice. Nobody wants to date a bitch or a dramaqueen!
Be Honest!
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Sure, there are some things you don't want to tell a man on a first date, but whatever you do choose to tell him make sure you don't lie about it. Don’t pretend to be something you’re not. If he loves football but you don’t, don’t pretend to do so. Don’t pretend to have attended concerts you haven’t been to, or to listen to bands you hate. If it ends up being a long term relationship, he’ll find out anyway, and if it makes a difference, you weren’t right for each other. Honesty really is the best policy.
Be Yourself!
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Overall, you need to let your true self show through. Don’t go in a suit if you’re a jeans kind of girl, or meet at the game if you can’t stand football. Wear something that makes you you, from quirky jewelry to your trademark hair style, and show him who you are. That really is the only way to make a guy fall in love with youand if he doesn't, it's just not meant to be hun!
First dates can be daunting, but it’s important to remember that it’s just the beginning! Have fun, but follow my tips and you’ll be creating the start of a good relationship, as well as teaching yourself good skills. Before you know it, you’ll be doing these naturally, and making everyone you meet feel special. Have you got a tip for making sure you get past the first date? Please let me know!
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