Visit any mall, beach, airport, or school, and you’re bound to see dozens of people, women especially, sporting major fashion blunders. Muffin top from poorly-fitting jeans abounds, and you can barely keep the snarky comments inside your own head. What’s worse is realizing you might be making a fashion faux-pas of your own! Red my list, commit it to memory, and rest assured you won’t be making any of these fashion blunders anytime soon…
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Muffin Top
Photo Credit: jonlarge
This is far and away my least favorite of all of the fashion faux-pas. It’s so unattractive, and so easy to avoid! Simply put, if your wear your jeans too small, that fat has to go somewhere — right over the top. It doesn’t help it you wear a clingy shirt, either… combined, you get muffin top. Ick!
Butt Cleavage
Photo Credit: ArizonaHiking
Again, if you’re wearing too-tight jeans, chances are you can’t pull them up where they ought to be. Which means every time you bend forward, or heaven forbid bend OVER, you’ll expose generous quantities of severely unwanted butt cleavage! Or worse, whale tail… when your panties stick up just barely covering your exposed butt crack! Guh-ROSS!
Frequently asked questions
Smushed Boobs
Photo Credit: DodogoeSLR
If you’re a blessed buxom beauty, you might occasionally notice the double-boob effect, where your breasts look cut in half, almost like two sets rather than one nice one. This can happen when you wear a bra that’s too small, pushing your extra breast right over the top of your bra, while holding the unlucky half tightly against your body. Uncomfortable and unattractive! Buy a bra that FITS! And while you’re at it, try your best to make sure your bra straps don’t show!
Sausage Rolls
Photo Credit: Malingering
This is another fashion faux-pas caused by jeans that are just too small. If your thighs (front or back) look like tight little sausage rolls, you need to go up a size. And besides looking awful, it can’t be comfortable to be squeezed into jeans that snug!
Saggy Butt
Photo Credit: ArizonaHiking
That’s right, another fashion blunder caused by too-tight jeans. I know a girl who sports this look nearly every single day, and no amount of gentle suggestion will make her change her ways. She walks around looking like she’s got a pants-load of something undesirable because her jeans are so tight she can’t pull them all the way up, leaving a bunch of loose, saggy material where her bottom ought to be! Paired with the sausage-roll thighs, muffin top, and butt cleavage, I’m one minute away from telling her to promise to only wear skirts from now on!
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The Old-man Look
Photo Credit: a2006maria1
Ever see those old men walking around in white sandals with black dress socks and khaki shorts? This ought to be an easy one to avoid, but plain and simple, don’t wear socks with casual sandals. There’s a cute look with anklets or knee socks with some sandals and shorts, but never wear socks with huaraches or other casual sandals!
One Word: Crocs
Photo Credit: jmbead
I’m so glad this trend is nearly faded and gone, but I still see lots of grown adults wearing these plastic shoes that really only look good on children. Stop it, right now!
Pajamas and Slippers as Fashion
Photo Credit: Malingering
The worst offenders seem to be high school and college girls, so if you’re one of them, please listen. Do NOT wear your saggy baggy pajama pants and slippers out in public! Also, resist the temptation to wear Uggs with your sweatpants tucked in! You may think you look cute and relaxed and comfortable, but really, you just look sloppy and lazy.
I’m sure that once you read this list, you’ll recognize at least one or two of your friends who are repeat offenders. If you can, tactfully show her this list, so she can mend her fashion faux-pas! Speaking of which, do you have another one to share? Please let me know, so I can add it to my list of wardrobe no-no’s…
Top Photo Credit: SocialEnemy
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