You live in Chicago, he lives in New York. You’re graduating high school in June, he just went to college. You live in the States, he lives across the world in Japan. How do you keep the love alive with so many miles in between? I’ve done it, and it can work! And now, with these 10 ways, you can make your long distance relationship work too!
1. Make a Kit
Before he leaves, make him a mailing kit with envelopes, stamps, postcards, address labels, and even cute stickers and a book of famous love poems and letters. That way, when he’s inspired, he can drop you a line without setting it aside because he doesn’t have a stamp.
2. Set Time Aside Every Day
Set time aside every day to call and say hello. The conversation doesn’t have to be long or involved. You just have to let him know you’re thinking of him. If he is in another country and calling him is just too expensive, meet online to chat even if it's just for a few minutes. With Skype and webcam, you will feel closer and more connected to him.
3. Set Time Aside Every Month
If possible, set aside one weekend every month to see each other. This will help you stay close and in tune with what’s going on in each other’s lives.
4. Set Time Side Every Four Months
Set time aside every four months to get away somewhereaway from home for both of you. Meet half-way, or meet somewhere far away for both of you, but spend time together that’s not on his home turf or yours.
5. Be Reasonable
Since you won’t be seeing as much of each other, don’t expect that nothing will change. It will, but that doesn’t mean it has to be negative. Accepting change and not getting into arguments every now and then but working together is one way to create a successful relationship.
6. Be Honest
If you’re feeling lonely, tempted, sad, or if you’re just missing him, tell him. The more you share with him honestly, the more he will trust you, and trust is key for ahealthy long-distance relationship.
7. Keep a Journal to Share
Keep an online or paper journal or diary for him. Make an entry every day, even if it’s not terribly long or detailed. If it’s online, post photos and links to things you enjoy.
8. Send Care Packages
Every two or three weeks, mail him a care package with whatever he likes: magazine clippings, his favorite snacks, goofy little sketches you doodled, a book, photos of you together.
9. Keep in Touch with Family and Friends
If the two of you are miles apart, you’ll feel less distant if you keep in touch with his family and friends, just like you did before he left.
10. Know when to Let Go
This goes hand-in-hand with “be reasonable.” Even if he lived right next door to you, or in the same house as you, he’d need his own time and his own space. Expect that he will still need a night out with the boys, and don’t nag him when he goes.
My grandmother says “distance makes the heart grow fonder” and in many ways, I do believe her. It’s not always easy being in along distance relationship, especially this time of year, but it can be done, and it can be fun! How do you keep your man interested and happy when he’s in another postal code? What are your tips for staying close and in love? Please let me know!
Top Photo Credit: Ben Heine