8 Things I'd like to Know about Men ...

I don’t know if men are from Mars, but they certainly are a bit of a mystery to me. Perhaps it’s growing up in a female-dominated family, but there are a lot of things about men that I just don’t understand. Here are some of them …

1. Sleep

How is it that men can sleep through babies crying, someone breaking in, planes flying overhead or the house collapsing in an earthquake? And yet if we so much as twitch a muscle, they sit up and complain ‘You woke me up!’.

2. Snoring

Why do they refuse to accept that snoring is their problem? They’re the ones making the noise, they’re the ones keeping others awake, and yet they get very annoyed if anyone complains! How dare we want a good night’s sleep!

3. Beer

What is it with beer? I know that some women like beer as well, but men almost seem to worship the stuff. Is their notion of masculinity so tied up with swigging from bottles of beer?

4. Sport

What is the fascination with sport, and why will they watch anything, no matter how obscure? Few women are quite as fanatical as men can be – if there’s no big match on TV, men will flick through the channels until they find pro-celebrity finger wrestling or the Finnish wife-carrying championships.

5. Laziness

Why do they still believe in the Laundry Fairy? Yes, men really do seem to think that if they throw their dirty clothes on the floor, the Laundry Fairy will flutter in, wave her wand, and instantly the laundry will be clean, ironed, folded and in the wardrobe, with not an unmatched sock left.

6. Pets

Why do men on the whole prefer dogs? Is it because they are supposed to? And if they’re going to get a dog, why do some of them get one that is smaller than my cat? Frankly, I’m not one for gender stereotypes, but a man walking (or carrying) a rat-sized dog just looks silly.

7. Greetings

This may only apply to British men, but I’ve noticed that they will never hug a friend, no matter how long they’ve known him. Instead, they settle for a manly handshake (but it’s okay to hug his wife). Continental men, however, have no problem giving a hug to a male friend.

8. Why???

Why do they exist? Were they put on earth just to plague women? Is this some kind of cosmic karma? Why do we still love them even though they drive us mad?

There are some great men around – husbands, fathers, brothers, friends – but let’s face it, even the nicest of men can irritate us sometimes! What is it about them that annoys you? Are there unanswered questions that you’ve never managed to work out?

Top Photo Credit: Marco Nunes