10 Ways to Overcome Shyness ...

By Kati

10 Ways to Overcome Shyness ...

Many people think shyness must be your natural programming, and so can’t be helped. While it is natural, there are plenty of things you can do to help yourself overcome shyness, and even some famous celebrities started out shy! Here are my top ten ways to overcome shyness...

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1 Understand Shyness...

Understand Shyness... Everyone has a different trigger. What makes you shy? Is it people, being out of your depth, self consciousness? Once you know what makes you shy, it’s much easier to face it!

2 Learn to Fight Self Consciousness...

Self consciousness is usually a major issue for shy people, even those who are often triggered by something else. Recognize that the world is busy, and most people are far too concerned with themselves to look at you. Use your self consciousness to become self aware, an amazing skill.

Image: Flickr.com

3 Find Your Strengths...


Everyone has strengths, and discovering these can make us feel really good about ourselves. Find something you are good at, from cooking to running, and focus on doing it well. This will boost your self esteem.

Image: Flickr.com

4 Like Yourself...

Like Yourself... Learn to appreciate yourself, and what you are good at. Write a list of your good points, do things that you enjoy, and learn to love yourself. Again, this will boost self esteem, and prevent you feeling worthless or worse, feel like hiding.

5 Don’t Conform...

Trying to be like everyone else is exhausting, and not worth the time. Now that you know what makes you amazing, appreciate that everyone is different, and give up trying to conform. So you’re not a social butterfly, who cares? You’ve got everything you need!

Image: Flickr.com

6 Look at Others...

Look at Others... Instead of thinking about yourself and how shy you feel in social situations, look at other people. Notice how they conduct themselves, and what they say. They might be feeling just as shy as you, but hiding it well.

7 Breathe...

Breathe... Practise a breathing exercise to keep you calm. Take deep breathes with your eyes shut, concentrating on inhaling and exhaling. This will calm you down, and keep you feeling assertive without being shy.

8 Run!

Run! Anxiety is stored up, making stressful situations even worse. Try running, or yoga, to release the blocked anxiety through movement.

9 Visualisation

Visualisation Visualize yourself as a confident person, one who deals with their shyness. Close your eyes, sit somewhere relaxing, and imagine yourself as the person you’d like to be. How do you feel? Get your senses involved to make it as real as possible, and use this visualization as a guide.

10 Affirmation

Affirmation Words have a huge impact on our lives. Tell yourself that you can overcome shyness, and that you are capable, confident and happy. This positive affirmation will reinforce positive thinking, and make you feel confident.

Shyness can be hard to overcome, but practice these tips and soon you’ll be feeling confident and in control, wherever you are. If you really struggle with your shyness, try talking to your doctor, who may be able to arrange medication or therapies for you which are proven to help. Have you got a tip on overcoming shyness? Please share it with me!

Top Photo Credit: Flickr.com

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I think I said before in another comment I am extremely shy. I still haven't figured out what makes me so shy though. I think I like myself enough. I do realize that people are too busy with their own concern to waste their time pondering about me. Still I can't help it. Just few seconds ago I was wondering I should go to the New years party with a lot of people or hang out with my sister at home. I always feel insecure. Few days ago a super cute guy was flirting with me and all I could do was laugh. I didn't want to say the wrong thing.

Sheila, you need to give yourself more credit for your strong points. You sound wonderful online, and all you have to do is to say these things out loud in front of a mirror or record yourself, and listen to the recording then think what you like and what you want to improve on. You have so much knowledge about so many different things, so it should be no problem for you to carry on a conversations with anyone. You have to believe in yourself. I was kind of a reserved person as well, but with time I realized that shy people have a hard time competing in this crazy world we live in,so I started to open up and engage in conversations. It is not good to be confrontational,but I bet if you thought about it you will realize how much stuff you really can talk about with anyone. It gets easier as you get older....believe me.

I always feel like everyone is looking at me, judging and talking about me behind my back. Talking about insecurity, huh? But now, I'm trying to be more positive and just relax. Unfortunately we can't control other people, we can't tell them to stop looking at us and stuff. Just don't think much about it. Keywords: Go out there and just relax. I know it's easier said than done but we should at least try.

All of these are very valid points about shyness. It is good to be somewhat reserved rather than overly loud, but being shy is something to work on overcoming. You have to tell yourself that you are as good as anyone else out there, or better. If they can do something, then you can too, maybe even better. Figure out what your strong points are and build on those, rather than worrying about your weak ones. Nobody is perfect, so you have to love what you have because there is nothing you can do about it, so be proud of yourself, keep your head high, and practice confidence. Practice carrying conversations in front of a mirror, which might help you, once you see yourself talk and your own body language. I know this is recommended for public speaking practice.

This is the story of my life. I'm a social retard. I have this great online personality but when it comes to real life, I go into my shell quicker than a turtle. I hate hate hate social situations. And the worst one for me is meeting the boyfriend's friends/family. I hyperventilate even thinking about it. I'm trying to work on it though. Iguess that's all you can do sometimes.

I find it really hard to overcome my insecurity and shyness. And the worst thing about it is that I don't really know what should I talk about when I'm with someone, whoever he/she is. I think I got dumber with time and can't even remember what I used to talk about with my peeps.

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