8 World Leaders That Need to Be Replaced ...

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COMMENT

With the UK elections coming up within a matter of weeks, I’ve been reflecting on the nature of democracy, and how even having the power to choose which party leads your nation doesn’t guarantee that you won’t end up with a national embarrassment as the public face of your nation. So here’s my list of world leaders who really should be given their marching orders.

1. Gordon Brown (UK)

Gordon Brown (UK)

Why, God, why? What did we do to deserve this bumbling idiot? Is it our punishment for the British Empire? Not fit to be in charge of counting the change from a slot machine, Brown somehow was allowed to ruin our economy, and then even more inexplicably put in charge of the entire country. As idiots go, nowhere near as entertaining as George ‘Dubya’ Bush.

Photo Credit: richardlai

2. Silvio Berlusconi (Italy)

Silvio Berlusconi (Italy)

Admittedly, his longevity is impressive given the short duration of just about every post-war Italian government, but really, this guy is an embarrassment. If they´re going to have a ladies’ man in power, Italy should pick someone thirty years younger who doesn’t make your skin crawl. I suggest George Clooney. George isn’t actually Italian, but hey, rules are made to be broken …

Photo Credit: ciokkolata_farabutto_ne ver_loved_berlusconi

3. Kim Jong-Il (North Korea)

Kim Jong-Il (North Korea)

Barking mad despot whose hobbies include starving his people, freaking out the West by testing nuclear missiles, and redefining the word Democratic (as in People’s Democratic Republic of Korea). Also notable for big head, bouffant hairstyle and lack of physical stature. Look at the photo. That head is way out of proportion. Note also fixed grins on faces of sycophantic minions hoping desperately to avoid being shot by laughing at the Dear Leader’s appalling jokes.

Photo Credit: Pan-African News Wire File Photos

4. Fidel Castro (Cuba)

Fidel Castro (Cuba)

Owner of embarrassingly dated beard and not aging nearly as well as our own dear Queen, his exact contemporary. Looks like he’s about to fall off his perch at any minute. May have seen off about a dozen US presidents in his 50 years in power, but outstayed his welcome by about 45 of them. Technically retired, but has passed on the reins to little brother Raul.

Photo Credit: BABAK.MOZAFFARI

5. Nicolas Sarkozy (France)

Nicolas Sarkozy (France)

Face it, shorty, marrying a supermodel has just made you look even more of a midget. If this photo wasn’t cropped, you’d see that Carla is actually lifting Sarko up, and his feet are at the level of her waist.

Photo Credit: Chesi - Fotos CC

6. Vladimir Putin (Russia)

Vladimir Putin (Russia)

Scary Russian leader who fancies himself as some kind of shirtless action man. I picked a photo where he is wearing a shirt. Thank me for this merciful gesture.

Photo Credit: mima11vladimir

7. Hugo Chavez (Venezuela)

Hugo Chavez (Venezuela)

Loudmouth who has succeeded in changing the constitution so that he can endlessly run for re-election. Unlike Kim, his head looks too small for his body.Thanks to Chavez, Venezuela is currently riding high in the CIA’s list of Annoying Countries We’d Like To Bomb The Crap Out Of But Don’t Have A Good Enough Excuse. Called Bush a donkey, which is funny, but not funny enough. Must do better.

Photo Credit: ricardo.bohorquez

8. Cristina Fernandez De Kirchner (Argentina)

Cristina Fernandez De Kirchner (Argentina)

Now, I like to support the sisterhood, but dear Cristina was taking on a bit much in trying to sort out the mess that is the Argentinian economy. Prettier than other leaders, but doesn’t seem to have achieved much. Policies seem to be based on nepotism, nepotism, nepotism – Kirchner followed her husband as President, plus her government includes her sister-in-law and a few more people with similar surnames. Coinicidence …?

Photo Credit: Cristina Fernández

So who fails to get your vote?

Top Photo Credit: Mr. Wright