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10 Love Lies He Will Tell ...

By Kati

The average man lies to his girlfriend six times a day, and they vary from small secrets to huge whoppers… what makes them so crafty? I was eager to find out, so I’ve been quizzing everyone from experts to close male friends on what lies they tell and why, and here are the 10 love lies he will be telling you…

1 “It Wasn’t Expensive”

Men like new things. Whether its an expensive hobby to a love of designer clothes or gadgets, there will be something that he just can’t resist spending money on. He’ll hate feeling that you disapprove though, or that you don’t think he is responsible with money, so instead of telling you what he spent he’s much more likely to just tell you it wasn’t expensive. Which, of course, justifies everything. The next time you want that gorgeous new dress? Just remember, it’s not expensive, hee hee!

2 “I’m on My Way”

Men usually use this one if you are making them attend somewhere they don’t want to go, such as a family barbeque or a child’s party. He knows he should go, and won’t risk telling you he doesn’t want to, as he doesn’t want to upset you. So instead, he tells you he is on his way, and sets out five minutes late. That way, he feels he has some control, and he has to spend less time where he doesn’t want to be. Which should mean he leaves in a better mood!

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3 “I’m Stuck in Traffic”

Whatever the reason, he is late. He woke up late, he helped a cat out of a tree, he was held up at work, he was buying you something. It doesn’t matter what he was doing, if he's late, he’ll tell you he is stuck in traffic. That way, he can’t be blamed for being late, as it's out of his control, and he won’t have to explain what held him up. He’s a man, and they aren’t famed for their communication. Well, not for good reasons, anyway!

4 “No, Your Bum Doesn’t Look Big”

So you are getting ready to go out, and you want his opinion. Does this colour suit me, do I look fat, does my bum look big? Well, what do you want to hear? Be honest, if your boyfriend told you it looked dreadful, you’d feel hurt and humiliated. And he knows this. Combined with the knowledge that answering wrong could mean you refuse to have sex with him for a year, and he will always stick with this all purpose answer.

5 “I Have No Signal,” “My Battery Died,” or “I Lost My Phone”

Well, these are three whoppers. They might be true, but chances are slim. Which means that he didn’t answer your call on purpose. Worried? Don’t be. Unless your relationship is experiencing other difficulties, its unlikely to be anything more serious then him just wanting a little time on his own. Men can be unsocial things, and sometimes an hour with just his XBOX is exactly what he needs. And after that hour? He’ll miss you more then ever.

8 “I’m Fine”

62% of men have admitted to telling their girlfriend they are fine, when really they weren’t. What can you do about it? A snappy response like this is a clear indication that something is wrong, but he isn’t yet ready to talk about it. Whether that is because he is working through it in his head, or simply hasn’t found a way to communicate it yet, he’ll open up to you when he is ready. So just let him know that you care, and that you are happy to listen when he needs you, and leave him be.

9 “I Didn’t Drink Too Much”

So he has the hangover from hell, or he said something really embarrassing. Whatever went wrong, he maintains he didn’t drink too much, and won’t budge. This could be a sign of a serious problem, such as the start of an alcohol dependency, but it's more likely to be his way of defending his masculinity. Men don’t drink too much, they know their limits and can handle their drinks. So let him be a man, and next time, hide his beer. It works wonders!

10 “I’m on My Last Beer”

Whether he's out with buddies drinking or playing darts, when you phone, he tells you he is on his last one. This is a more indirect lie. He probably does think his next pint will be his last, but its also a good way to get you to hang up, and let him get back to his friends. So while it's very annoying, it’s a harmless lie.

How many times have you heard these lies? Me and my friends always giggle when we hear them now, but after getting to the bottom of why he tells them, they aren’t so bad after all. I mean, they are harmless enough! Can you think of a lie that men tell? I’d love to hear it!

Top Photo Credit: About_a_Boy

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