Is Your Friendship Worth Risking for Romantic Love?

Is Your Friendship Worth Risking for Romantic Love?
By Mabelle • Aug 14, 2021 MD

The situation can go either way when you risk your friendship finding out that you are in love with him or with her: you can turn your friend into a lover and end up as a couple with a happy ending, or you can end up making things awkward for the both of you and ruin a perfectly good, platonic relationship.

So how will you know if your 'love' is worth risking your friendship? At the end of the day, it all depends on how strongly you feel for your friend. Use both your heart and your mind in making the decision. Can you bear the thought of losing a perfectly good friendship if you find out that your friend does not feel the same way? Once you blurt out your feelings, that will be the turning point of your relationship and your friendship - as it was before - can never be brought back. On the other hand, if your feelings are so strong that you just cannot bear the thought of your friend not knowing how you feel, then it is probably worth risking the friendship.

Whether your friend returns the romantic feelings that you have or not is a question which will be difficult to ask - but taking the risk of ruining your friendship is more acceptable than not letting your friend know how you feel. Who knows, if your friend secretly feels the same way about you, you just might be in for a happy ending.

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

  • Søren

    2010-04-01T22:24:40.000Z

    After being e-mail friends with a woman for a couple of years, I recently met her during a business trip. I was attracted immediately to her looks and to her brilliant mind. We are both writers. I am going through a divorce after a 15-year marriage. We met at a party and then spent a day together. The conversation was fantastic. I was more open with her than I am with most people. By the end of our time I wanted to share how I was feeling, but I feared she might misinterpret me. Was she just being kind to someone from out of town? I have been sad and lonely, and maybe this was too obvious? Since returning home I have written her a couple of times and phoned, and she does not respond. She is a very busy person. But I worry that I lost my one opportunity for this connection. It is frustrating to have this distance between us with the only contact by very occasional e-mail or looking at her on Facebook. I wonder what her touch feels like and despair that I will never know. Is it too impersonal - or too needy - to send her an e-mail saying what I have been thinking about? Is it normal to feel this lovelorn?
  • Meream

    2009-11-23T22:43:18.000Z

    Todd, I'm with Sheila. Gotta stop the nagging (?) bit and let her heart just decide on its own. And yes, do keep up posted. I'm sure she'll come around because I'm sure you're a great catch. :)
  • William

    2009-08-13T02:26:59.000Z

    Thanks heaps for your help Olga! It's just what i needed to hear. Such a therapeutic blog. We met up the other day. We were both so anxious, we could barely make eye contact. It was still fun and all that. There was pretty much zero flirting going on. We didn't talk about it at all, but i really wanna know what she's thinking about it. Oh well i feel queezy about it all. Still, i'm glad its out in the open and she knows clearly how i feel. Such an interesting time for me :)
  • william

    2010-02-14T12:29:12.000Z

    So it's been a couple of months since I wrote on here. Just thought i'd share a significant update... Since I let my friend know how I felt about her (and her rejecting me), i've played it completely cool and not given her any special attention. After months of ignoring her, last night we went out. She told me she loves me and she wants to spend the rest of her life with me! We kissed and left it at that. It's a great outcome, i'm not sure what to do next though. I'm not sure if I should keep the cool act going. We aren't best friends anymore, but we are starting to develop a totally new romantic friendship. I feel pretty good though :) Risking it was worth it.
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