They say you can fix a broken vase but the glue will always show. Now, that may work for glassware but relationships are something else. It’s true that, once an adultery has been committed, you can’t expect the things to go back to normal overnight, but many couples have managed to beat the odds, get past the cheating episode and live happily ever after. So, if you’re the one that cheated, the one that is trying to get past the partner’s infidelity or, if you just know a person that might use an advice – here are 7 steps that will make dealing with the situation easier.

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1. Think Things through

The cheating one has to decide whether he loves his partner enough to do everything possible to salvage the relationship. Cheating is the worst thing you can do and it would be foolish to expect the other person to say, “Ok, I forgive you. Now, did you get that shampoo I asked you to pick up on your way home?” It takes a lot of hard work and sacrifice! Now, if you have been cheated on, I can totally understand how you feel right now. And, believe me, hiding it and pretending you don’t care is wrong. Let it all out, cry, don’t keep the pain bottled up inside. Once that is out of your system you will be able to think more rationally and decide whether you want the cheater back or no.

2. Get to the Bottom of It

Talking about the things that made you or your partner resort to cheating is not easy but it’s the only way. You see, I think most of my relationships failed because of the fact that I like to shove problems under the rug and pretend that everything is OK. Now, that’s definitely the easier way but it only leads to more problems and ends with cheating, breaking up or both. Find the problems and work up the solutions so you could have a fresh start.

3. Forget the Words and Focus on the Acts

“I love you” sure did mean a lot before that cheating episode but, honestly, it’s worth a diddly squat now! So, if you are the cheating one, find other ways to demonstrate your love and regain your “relationship credibility”. Just make sure they don’t involve material things because your loved one might feel like you are trying to buy their love. Explain how sorry you are, take responsibility for your actions and be prepared to answer all the questions your partner may have.

4. Forgive and Forget

Your partner had cheated on you, you’ve discussed it and decided to move on and try to make it work. Congratulations for letting the love win! However, jealousy and the lack of trust may interfere here so make sure that, once you forgive your cheating partner and learn a lesson, you observe the cheating episode as a thing of the past. Your partner should help you with that by working hard to regain your trust and you should be open to that. Don’t give in easily because he/she has to learn a lesson too, but don’t fall into the trap of using that mistake as an excuse to act jealous, make insulting comments or make him/her suffer.

If you're looking to engage your partner in intriguing conversations, why not try some hypothetical questions for couples? These fun queries will not only keep the conversation lively but also stimulate deep thoughts and potentially reveal insights about each other's personality and thought processes.

5. Rekindle the Old Flames

Think about the things that brought you two together, that made you grow strong as a couple and re-experience those moments. Start going to dinners and visiting museums once again or go camping, hiking or anything you like. Do all those things you used to do while your relationship was still fresh. You see, one of the most common reasons for cheating is the feeling of being stuck in a rut. And, let’s face it, all relationships go through that boring phase when one person knows exactly what the other person will say, do or suggest.

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6. Don’t Be Vindictive

Your partner’s cheating is not your get-out-of-jail-free card. If you take his cheating as a permission to cheat back once the good opportunity comes out, what’s the point of saving the relationship now only to destroy it again in a couple of days, months or years?

7. Work on the Trust

Every healthy relationship is build upon trust so, once you manage to trust each other again, things can go their usual way. Sometimes it takes years to get the relationship to what it used to be before the “unfortunate event”, sometimes you realize that you can never feel the same for that person again but sometimes, cheating or being cheated on opens your eyes and makes you realize how much you love that person and how you can’t stand the thought of losing her. The cheater should work very hard on rebuilding that trust – no lies, no checking out other girls/guys and no shutting off the phone.

What is your take on this? Have you ever been in this situation and, if yes, how did you deal with it? Feel free to add more tips and share your opinion on cheating, forgiving and moving on. Would you find it in your heart to forgive or would you break up immediately?

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Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

My husband of 10 years was unfaithful, I never thought he would do this to me, but he did. I didn't see the signs, he gave us everything we wanted or needed. When he was with this other woman, he was giving me everything I wanted, emotionally. He lead me to believe that we were fine. So now that I found out, I feel betrayed. Everything he doesn't makes me feel like he is still with her. Don't know what to do, I love my husband, what if I am wrong? What if he is not doing anything? I accuse him of cheating now, I know it's just matter of time for him to leave me. I saw his text messages, messages from me, everything I sent to him is there, but everything he sent me is deleted. All the message that he sent me regarding his love for me aren't there. What doesn't that mean. I am confused

I know this is a women page but i am a guy looking for help in all sorts of places, i cheated on my wife with two women, i really love her and am trying to make everything better, but it is so hard. We r trying, but how do i prove to her once and for all i will not hurt her again? She is also trying but i get all the worst out of her, if you know wat i am saying, i hear it every couple of hrs from her, i cant be at work and not hear a something bad either. Im trying to find advice for the both of us to read. I know its gonna be hard, but i will do anything to have her heart back in my life as it once was, she means the world to me and i think she is worth the fight for.

Husband cheated on me with a prostitute. He said he just did it. He was in another country on business and got approached walking down the street (this was in the Phillipines). He said he realized what he had done 5 seconds into the sex (used a condom) and told her to get the f**k out. He waited 9 months to tell me. I am so angry, we have been together 30 years. I am glad I found your website, as I'm searching for answers. He is beyond remorseful and wants to stay together, we have just started marriage counselling on his insistance!!!

3 weeks ago my boyfriend broke up with me and the next day i got drunk and slept with his best friend. I told my boyfriend the next day because this is something i could not keep to myself. He threw out all my stuff and told me to never speak to him again. But he texted me every single day about how he missed me but was so angry and couldnt believe id do something like that. I told him i did it because i was numb and depressed and his best friend manipulated me and i didnt sleep with him because i liked him Ive apologised a thousand times. Me and my ex saw each other a couple of times and i thought we were going to get back together, and then after a couple of weeks he texted me saying it was over. Then about 5 days later he started texting me again saying he missed me and he's back to not knowing if he wants me back. I feel so awful about what i did and im doing all i can to make up for it and its killing me that he doesnt know what hes going to do because none of us can heal properly. Im so scared, i want him back so much and im doing everything i can. What should i do? What do you think? I really need help

Hello , so I was reading this because I feel that the situation I am in right now is similar and wished for some advice I started talking to this guy I met at church and I felt like he was the right for me we had a lot of moments we had that made me think and feel a lot for him , one day we opened up to each other and we confessed to each other that we had feelings for one another and how we felt about it we decided to wait in God timing for everything to go right for us to take a relationship in God timing we thought it was best for us to be close and get to know each other more and keep praying that if its God will time passed and I was happier with him and he was as well , but there came a day where all that changed I started seeing him diferent around me he would still tell m nice things but at time I would feel him so far away I didn't understand why , throughout time I got the answer to my question through social media I saw a picture of him with another girl hugging and showing that they were in a relationship it broke me down because we had lots a hope for each other he build me a rainbow full of happiness and like any other girl I fell into depression and cried didn't know what to do , of course I asked why he did it knowing that he was talking to me and praying for me and told him t stop lying to me and show me the truth , he confessed that he was talking to the other girl and that yes it was fun but that was it with her that she was just a person he thought he would like but he realized that she wasn't the one he wanted to be with he said how he regrets it and he would of wished to tell me sooner and that he was in a moment of confusion and didn't know what he wanted and he was broken I understood I wasn't very convinced because I was hurt and I prayed I realized to give him a chance to start over with me and forget that he was talking to another girl and make things right again he felt that he didn't he didn't deserve a second chance because he felt horrible about and take all things back , right now yes I like him a lot and i still feel hurt what he did to me and don't comprehend why he did it but im willing to continue to pray and be there for him and he as well said he would put his part him talked to the girl and told her that i was the one he wanted to be with and yes she was hurt and made me feel bad in a way because I know someone was going to get hurt , its difficult because i feel like hugging him and being close but I know its not right because this is recent , I have thoughts a lot of times because i feel like how about if we get into a relationship someday and he cheats. But i feel if its God will i know we will stay together and grow together .He does tell me to look for God and pray for him and even through all the chaos that i still for God and not depend on him because he failed me My question and advice is it right for me to forgive and forget and what can I do to overcome what he did and for my heart to heal am I suppose to get away for him for a while and keep praying ? I really do want us to work and do things and he as well expressed to me that he also wants that

I have a big problem well to me it is and need help from a girls view

just found out my partner had cheated but he was living back at his mums he was always telling me he loved me and we were a couple having problems and we were trying to rebuild our relationship.he used to stay over and we would sleep together and would say he loved me and it was just the arguements that was the problem.this happened for nearly a year.always promising we sort things out we had been together for 11 years before he left.then i found out he had been seeing someone else .just says you know now dont have to lie .his nasty when he comes to pick up kids and hasnt even said sorry his angry at me because it came out about him and the other woman at work as he told her he was truly single while still sleeping with me convincing me we were working things out.he dosent even look at all sorry.its been nearly 2 weeks and not even a expanation or anything.his just anrgry because people hate him at work andive ruined it for him with the other woman to.my world has fell apart.

I cheated on my boyfriend of 5 years at the start of this year. Thing is we had just broken up but were in the process of mending. I was truly shattered when we did break up and turned to someone I definitely shouldn't have. He recently found out but never said anything until today. I really want to work it out, I love him to much to let this relationship go.