20 Funny Jokes about Men ...

20 Funny Jokes about Men ...
By Kati • Mar 8, 2025

Feeling a bit anti-man today? Here are twenty funny jokes that are bound to bring a smile to your face :)

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#1

Never let your man's mind wonder – it’s too little to be out on its own.

***

This statement highlights the idea that men can be easily distracted and need guidance and support from their female partners. It also plays on the stereotype that men are not as mentally strong or capable as women. This joke may be seen as humorous by some, but it perpetuates harmful gender stereotypes and reinforces the idea that women are responsible for keeping men in line. Additionally, this joke may not be relevant to the fashion category of the blog and could potentially alienate male readers. It is important to be mindful of the language and jokes used when discussing gender roles and relationships within the context of fashion.

#2

If you want a committed man, look in a mental hospital.

10 Signs He’s Ready to Commit …

***

Men are often perceived as commitment-phobes, and this joke plays on that stereotype. It suggests that if a woman wants someone who is committed, she should look in a mental hospital. This joke could be seen as humorous, but it also implies that men are not capable of commitment. It's important to remember that not all men are the same, and many are committed and loyal partners. Furthermore, this joke can be seen as a reminder that mental health should be taken seriously. Mental health issues can affect anyone, regardless of gender, and should not be trivialized.

#3

Definition of a man with manners – he gets out of the bath to pee.

***

A man with manners is someone who not only respects himself but also those around him. He is courteous, polite, and mindful of his actions. He is a gentleman who understands the importance of proper etiquette and follows it.

When it comes to bathroom etiquette, a man with manners will always get out of the bath to use the restroom. This is a sign of respect for other people in the house, as well as a sign of consideration for the bathroom itself. Not only does it prevent any potential accidents, but it also keeps the bathroom clean and hygienic.

In addition to getting out of the bath to pee, a man with manners will always flush the toilet after use, wash his hands, and not leave any mess behind. He will also close the door when using the restroom, and will not leave any items lying around the bathroom.

Finally, a man with manners will always close the bathroom door when leaving, and will never leave the bathroom in a mess. This is a sign of respect for the other people living in the house, as well as a sign of consideration for the bathroom itself.

#4

What did God say after creating Adam? I must be able to do better than that!

***

Men have long been the butt of jokes and stereotypes, from their supposed lack of fashion sense to their supposed inability to ask for directions. But one of the most enduring jokes is about God's reaction to creating Adam. The joke goes that after God created Adam, he said "I must be able to do better than that!" This joke has been around for centuries, and it still gets a laugh today.

The joke has been used to poke fun at men's supposed lack of intelligence, creativity, and ability to solve problems. It has also been used to suggest that men are inferior to women in terms of their ability to think and reason. But in reality, men are just as capable as women when it comes to problem-solving and intelligence.

The joke is also a reminder that men and women are created differently, and that these differences should be celebrated. Men and women have different strengths and weaknesses, and it is important to recognize and appreciate these differences.

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#5

What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? A widow!

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***

In the article "20 Funny Jokes about Men..." published on a women-focused blog in the fashion category, the author discusses common stereotypes about men and how they often claim to be feminists but still exhibit traditional gender roles such as opening doors, driving, and paying for dinner. The article also mentions that some men may only claim to be feminists in order to impress women and gain their favor. However, it is important to note that not all men fall into these stereotypes and there are many men who genuinely support and advocate for gender equality. The article aims to shed light on the humorous side of these stereotypes while also highlighting the need for genuine support and action towards feminism.

#7

Men are like ... Placemats.

They only show up when there's food on the table.

#8

Men are like... Government bonds.
They take so long to mature.

***

Men are often known for their slow maturity and this joke plays on that idea. Government bonds are known for their long-term investments, and this joke suggests that men are similar in that they take a long time to mature.

This joke is often used to poke fun at the idea that men take longer to mature than women. It is a humorous way of pointing out that men can be slow to grow up and take on more responsibility.

Men are also known for their stubbornness, and this joke suggests that men can be slow to change their ways. This is often a source of frustration for the women in their lives, as men are often resistant to change.

The joke is also a reminder that men should not be taken too seriously, and that it is important to have patience when dealing with them. Men can be difficult to understand and it is important to be patient and understanding with them.

This joke is a humorous way of pointing out the differences between men and women and the challenges they face in relationships. It is a reminder that while men and women may have different approaches to life, it is important to be respectful and understanding of each other.

#9

Men are like... Lava lamps.
Fun to look at it but not all that bright.

***

Men have long been the butt of jokes, and this one about them being like lava lamps is a classic. Lava lamps are known for their mesmerizing, swirling motion, but they are not known for their intelligence. This joke implies that men may be visually pleasing, but not the most intelligent creatures. This joke is a lighthearted way to poke fun at men, and it is a popular joke among women. Women often use humor to express their thoughts and feelings about men in a fun and lighthearted way. This joke is just one of many that women use to make light of the differences between the sexes.

#10

Men are like... Bank accounts.
Without a lot of money they don't generate a lot of interest.

#11

Men are like... Handguns.
Keep one around long enough and your gonna want to shoot it.

#12

Men are like... ..Parking spots.
The good ones are taken, and the rest are too small.

***

Men have long been the butt of jokes, and this one is no exception. In this particular joke, men are compared to parking spots. The joke implies that the good men are taken, while the rest are too small.

The joke is often used to illustrate the idea that men are hard to come by, and that the best of them are already taken. It can also be used to poke fun at the idea that men are not always as reliable or as good as they seem.

The joke is often used in a light-hearted manner and is not meant to be taken seriously. It is often used to bring a smile to the face of those who hear it.

The joke is especially popular among women, who often use it to make light of the challenges they face when it comes to finding a suitable partner. It is also often used in the context of fashion, as it is a clever way to make a statement about the importance of finding the right fit when it comes to clothing.

#13

COMMITMENT (ko-mit-ment) n.:
Female: A desire to get married and raise a family.
Male: Not trying to pick up other women while out with one's girlfriend.

9+ Words Women Use …

#14

MAKING LOVE (may-king luv) n.:
Female: The greatest expression of intimacy a couple can achieve.
Male: Call it whatever you want just as long as we end up in bed.

#15

The bride, upon her engagement, went to her mother and said,
"I've found a man just like father!".

Her mother replied,
"So what do you want from me, sympathy?"

#16

Man: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
Woman: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

#17

Man: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
Woman: If I saw you naked, I'd probably die laughing.

#18

OFFSPRING
Ah, children. A woman knows all about her children. She knows about dentist appointments and soccer games and romances and best friends and favorite foods and secret fears and hopes and dreams.

A man is vaguely aware of some short people living in the house

#19

Any argument that a man and woman are involved in, the woman gets the last word. Anything a man says afterwards is the beginning of a new argument.

***

This paragraph highlights the common stereotype that women always get the last word in arguments. It plays on the idea that women are more skilled in communication and have the ability to outwit men in any argument. This stereotype is often perpetuated in society, with women being labeled as "nagging" or "bossy" when they assert themselves in a discussion. However, it is important to recognize that this stereotype is not true for all women and men. Effective communication and conflict resolution skills are not determined by gender, but rather by individual personalities and experiences. It is important to challenge and break down these stereotypes in order to create more equal and respectful relationships between men and women.

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'Crazy' mullahs? Burkhas? Firstly INSHALLAH the world is put under the sharia law. Secondly, some muslim women prefer to wear the burqa, i wantd to wear one bt wasnt allowd ...some of us ratha cova ourselves completely than hav men perve at our curves, chek out n luv us 4 our looks, were more impo than tat, thirdly, 'crazy' mullahs, pshh the american gov. Is crazy, wat happend to guantanamo bay in cuba n abu ghraib in iraq eh? If they tried gettn away wif tat stuff behind our bak than GOD knows wat there doin behind our bak now! N y dnt u consirda tha fact MOST of the ppl put in those prisons werent evn 'terriost'! N u hav no real reason to believe Taliban r terriost, u jst see stuff bout em on tha news- which is known 4 lieing! Tha problem today is not alot of ppl know tha truth

hey its all in fun and games. i make fun of men all the time but i love my hubby to death and never have anything against him . i just think the jokes are funny and when i txt him one everyday he laughs about it tells his buddys then they send me one back..lol beign harsh on men cracks me up but i can take it back in return. theres nothing wrong with a few good jokes!!

It may seem funny to some ladies, but many men, such as myself, would never stoop to spreading "jokes" like these about women. Am I taking it too seriously? Maybe, but I wonder why people feel the need to bash each other, even if it's supposedly in jest. Respect is a two-way street.

Its always nice to read something about us :P

This is rediculous. Look in the dictionary for the definition of the word commitment. And the jokes about men being immature, yeah women mature faster than men, up until they hit 16, then women STOP maturing. and chivalry is dead because women killed it. Not our fault.

I am a receptionis in community welfare, so I am surrounded by feminists. Counselors, social workers, psychologists. They talk about equality but its just a tired buzzword. the basic philosphy is women good, men bad. We have a male youth worker but I think he knows he has to be profeminist so he just reflects us. I think he lost his character because hes nervous when he says manly opinions and looks around. I try to have a positive influence. We have a male cleaner, who I am nice to because he sees the jokes about men on the staffroom notice board. Thats their appreciation for cleaning our toilets. But he always help me move things and is a nice man. We had a fire in rubbish bin last year with lots of smoke. we ran outside and didn't have a thought about him. we even told the firemen everyone was safe. then he came out form making sure no one was left inside. thats what I mean. it made me feel awful. Men have something we dont. My dad has it too, and my brother and boy friend too, but not at first, my brother woke it up in him.

Good job!!!! Thanks,I needed a good laugh today....Monday at work is always like Friday the 13th...

Yeah I don't mind jokes about men, but I like to know that it really is just a joke and underneath there is still appreciativeness. Anomious, women don't do dangerous jobs in any substantial numbers comparable to men. Do the research, check the statistics. Start noticing the gender of people you see doing the highly danger jobs - not just being in the job, but actually doing the dangerous task. Even where women are in the dangerous jobs, like police and defence, men are getting killed at least 10 times more, across all dangerous jobs because when the job gets dangerous the men protect the women. Plus the stats are misleading, for instance nearly all women in mining work in admin, not underground. I don't appreciate women doing dangerous jobs alongside men because I know the men are protecting themselves and their female colleagues and it makes the job more dangerous for the men. My brother is a policemen and has often had to tackle dangerous people and been injured while his female partners have never assisted him until its over. If he had male partners he wouldn't get injured so often. Its just how it is, but most women won't face it.

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