Many people think shyness must be your natural programming, and so can’t be helped. While it is natural, there are plenty of things you can do to help yourself overcome shyness, and even some famous celebrities started out shy! Here are my top ten ways to overcome shyness...
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1. Understand Shyness...
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Everyone has a different trigger. What makes you shy? Is it people, being out of your depth, self consciousness? Once you know what makes you shy, it’s much easier to face it!
2. Learn to Fight Self Consciousness...
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Self consciousness is usually a major issue for shy people, even those who are often triggered by something else. Recognize that the world is busy, and most people are far too concerned with themselves to look at you. Use your self consciousness to become self aware, an amazing skill.
Image: Flickr.com
3. Find Your Strengths...
Everyone has strengths, and discovering these can make us feel really good about ourselves. Find something you are good at, from cooking to running, and focus on doing it well. This will boost your self esteem.
Image: Flickr.com
4. Like Yourself...
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Learn to appreciate yourself, and what you are good at. Write a list of your good points, do things that you enjoy, and learn to love yourself. Again, this will boost self esteem, and prevent you feeling worthless or worse, feel like hiding.
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5. Don’t Conform...
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Trying to be like everyone else is exhausting, and not worth the time. Now that you know what makes you amazing, appreciate that everyone is different, and give up trying to conform. So you’re not a social butterfly, who cares? You’ve got everything you need!
Image: Flickr.com
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6. Look at Others...
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Instead of thinking about yourself and how shy you feel in social situations, look at other people. Notice how they conduct themselves, and what they say. They might be feeling just as shy as you, but hiding it well.
7. Breathe...
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Practise a breathing exercise to keep you calm. Take deep breathes with your eyes shut, concentrating on inhaling and exhaling. This will calm you down, and keep you feeling assertive without being shy.
8. Run!
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Anxiety is stored up, making stressful situations even worse. Try running, or yoga, to release the blocked anxiety through movement.
9. Visualisation
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Visualize yourself as a confident person, one who deals with their shyness. Close your eyes, sit somewhere relaxing, and imagine yourself as the person you’d like to be. How do you feel? Get your senses involved to make it as real as possible, and use this visualization as a guide.
10. Affirmation
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Words have a huge impact on our lives. Tell yourself that you can overcome shyness, and that you are capable, confident and happy. This positive affirmation will reinforce positive thinking, and make you feel confident.
Shyness can be hard to overcome, but practice these tips and soon you’ll be feeling confident and in control, wherever you are. If you really struggle with your shyness, try talking to your doctor, who may be able to arrange medication or therapies for you which are proven to help. Have you got a tip on overcoming shyness? Please share it with me!
Top Photo Credit: Flickr.com
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Comments
Rose: These are some great tips!! I don't suffer from shyness, actually i'm quite opposite of shy, but i have many friends that are very shy. Some just because their parents are, and some because they've lost brothers or parents. I'll be sure to have them take a look at these!! Thanks for the great post (:
suburbangrandma: All of these are very valid points about shyness. It is good to be somewhat reserved rather than overly loud, but being shy is something to work on overcoming. You have to tell yourself that you are as good as anyone else out there, or better. If they can do something, then you can too, maybe even better. Figure out what your strong points are and build on those, rather than worrying about your weak ones. Nobody is perfect, so you have to love what you have because there is nothing you can do about it, so be proud of yourself, keep your head high, and practice confidence. Practice carrying conversations in front of a mirror, which might help you, once you see yourself talk and your own body language. I know this is recommended for public speaking practice.
Fatima: I think I said before in another comment I am extremely shy. I still haven't figured out what makes me so shy though. I think I like myself enough. I do realize that people are too busy with their own concern to waste their time pondering about me. Still I can't help it. Just few seconds ago I was wondering I should go to the New years party with a lot of people or hang out with my sister at home. I always feel insecure. Few days ago a super cute guy was flirting with me and all I could do was laugh. I didn't want to say the wrong thing.
Emilie: This article wrongly confuses shyness with insecurity. Introversion and extroversion are just personality traits, and one isn't better than the other. Introversion isn't a sickness, it doesn't need to be cured.
Amy: Ahh I used to be like that. I was as insecure as can be. I still am a bit but I try to over come it. I always thought that people were talking, looking laughing about me. And not in a good way. sometimes I didn't say anything for the whole day because I was afraid I'd say something stupid. =( I'm a work in progress.
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