6. Stomach upset
You’ve cooked a wonderful meal but he is suddenly full or not hungry. His favorite dishes are left on the table three weekends in a row. Where is he eating his meals?
7. Perfume evidence
You don’t like floral perfumes, but what’s it doing on your husband’s laundry? That smell is becoming more and more familiar to you and it’s not yours!
8. Lies
Cover up. You can see it a mile away. You’re used to spotting a lie when your son is the guilty one, but now your husband isn’t being truthful. He doesn’t look you in the eye anymore.
9. Emails
He’s at the computer almost all the time. He has new email accounts and you don’t have the password. He closes down chat windows when you walk into the room. Is he hiding his communication to someone?
10. Bank accounts
Unexplained payments at jewelry stores and gift shops when you haven’t received a gift from him in months. Who is he buying these gifts for anyway? Hmm…
It’s real and it happens to thousands of women & men everyday all over the world, which is why my friend and I started our website in order to help others who have been in the same situation.
We both went through the pain of betrayal and suffered through our husbands cheating on us. She remained in her marriage and was able to rebuild.
I left and made a new and better life for myself with someone else.
It can be done, it’s not easy, but we are there for anyone who wants our advice.
Liz
Please help me. My boyfriend on and off for two years has more femalee friens than guy friends. The problem is is that he emails this one certain girl, tells me that he talks to her,but won’t show me the emails??? He lied about tellng her about me also, and when I caught him, he said it was so I wld quit worrying about it….I’m so confused
Trust is very important in a relationship. You may see the signs but they dont necessarilu mean that he’s already cheating.
I have a man I’ve been seeing for two years. Everytime we’re together he is texting. It annoys me. We have the usual intimacy, and dinners, I’ve even met his parents. We spend a lot of time together, and even go to events. I have met the important people in his life.
He has female and male friends, but there is this one female friend that is two years younger than I am. She says they used to “date.” I’m sure a lot more happened, by her actions. She tells him she misses him and loves him. I tried to put my foot down, but he got angry at me??
One night he left at 7pm to do some “business work,” he didn’t return back until almost midnight. I am not positive, but some think he was doing something else other than what he said??
I have told him I love him, and I really want to be with him, but he avoids our conversations.. What do any of you think? I cannot imagine life before him. I really do love him.
hello,
my husband and i have been together for seven years and married for five years this may. a couple of months ago he told me he was unhappy and confused about what he wanted. well there is a lady he works with and i knew that they talked at work but one day i came home from work and checked his email and he had changed his password so i changed it and was able to get in to his acct only to find out that he had been emailing her the message that i found was “i meant holly knows how i feel now”. after seeing that i freaked out and check our cell phone record only to find out that they have been talking on the phone to again i knew that the talked at work but i had no idea about the emailing and talking on the cell phone, i told my husband i found the phone records and his email and he swore to me that nothing was going on she was just a friend and he needed someone to talk to about “our problems”. i felt so betrayed and felt like he cheated on me emotionally…he swears nothing has happened sexually and i want to believe him but i cant. so we started going to marriage counseling and have been for the last two months but nothing has changed he now likes to leave when he gets “angry” the other night we got into an argument and he made a phone call outside he came in changed cloths and said he was going to watch his dad play a softball game so i asked him if he planned on spending the night and he said no so i told him he needed to pack his crap and just leave. i packed my kids clothes and went to spend the night at my parents. i didnt find out until the next morning that he didn’t even come home he supposedly spent the night with his sister!!! once again i checked the cell phone records and what do you know two different times last night he had two blocked phone calls that came in one was at eleven at night so i questioned him about it he stated that the lady he had been talking to had left her husband and she was very upset at work so he called one of her friends to check on her!!! i then asked how he got this number and he told me one night a few weeks ago at one of his valleyball games that this lady and her kids and her friend showed up to supposedly watch her cousin play. anyway my husband walked up to them and asked what they were doing there and the kids thought that my husband was flirting with the friend so she gave him her number!!! which my husband left that part out when he told me that he had ran into her at the game of course…….well now i made him pack and leave so its my first night alone and i am scared and so hurt!!! he is trying to make me feel like this is my fault and that him talking to her is not a big deal at all….please help me!!!!
Many of these are false positives.
If a guy is working overtime, he may be doing just that: Working overtime.
Taking care of a family or a wife isn’t cheap. It’s very expensive, especially with inflation.
Spending lots of time on the computer could be a sign of cheating, but again, it could just be a sign of internet addiction. I’ve been using chat rooms since 1996. I grew up online. I’ve known people on internet messageboards for 10 years. In fact, I met my current fiancee through a friend I met on the internet. So being online a lot could just be a sign of internet addiction.
Because I’m online alot and I work lots of odd hours, she accuses me of cheating on her.
Actually, it’s the opposite. When I go online, the first thing I tell any woman I first meet is that I’m looking only for friends. As much as I love her, we have little in common when it comes to tastes. So I look for friends who have the same tastes as I do. But it’s established that I’m looking for friends and only friends, and they’re cool with it.
When I work the long hours, it’s because she kind of likes to be pampered when we go out to eat. I’m satisfied getting the soup, the beans or the plain rice. She’s not.
So even though cheaters might use work and the internet as a way to cheat, using the internet and working long hours might be just that; Working long hours and using the internet.
hi, i am confused and very stressed out about my bf, because these days when i ask him something he doesnt look me in the eye for example if id ask him have you ever had another gf he would be playing with the blanket and say no i havnt you are stupid why you asking me this you dont even trust me and also if id ever ask him something he would just get angry and say to me that i ask too much and say d make him mad, but im really confused and scaerd what if he is seeing someone else like an prostitute or another girl. i really want to know the obvious and main cheating signs of a guy cheating because most of the cheating signs i have looked at are not helping me at all, so please help me!!
Hello i am wondering about something. My fiancee, of eight years is acting strange to me. Well about 6 months to a year ago. He got real upset that this guy at his job got hired. Well I guess his boss started having an affair with this new guy, and it seemed that my guy got jealous, and always kept saying I am going to quit this job. All he could talk about was their relationship and saying I know they are having sex. Well anyways, she used to ask my guy to help her with the van, like fix them at her home. well when this so called relationship started with this new guy, he quit working on the work vans. Well last week he came home from work and said his boss fired this guy, and he seemed estatic by it. I am worried, because she also called him the next day, and wanted to speak to him. He was scheduled to work a couple of mornings, so he thought that she was calling him into work early that day so he did not answer. well anyways, friday he came home and told me that she asked him if he would come over and clean her house because she was redoing her house. Now why doesn’t she and her husband clean there own house. I am wondering why she is having such interest in him again and should I question him about it. Plus he said something startling a while back, she has hit ON every MALE THAT HAS WORKED FOR HER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! And if this is true he has been there a good 4 to 5 years. plus she is married herself. Should I be concerned!!!!!!!!!!!!!! please reply back
I guess you need to talk this out with your guy. If you feel uncomfortable with their closeness, then you need to speak up.
rofl, blonde hair! Because we all know blondes sleep with everyone’s husband…and just about everyone else! Kidding, not really. The REAL reason is because a lot of women dye their hair blonde, and brunettes have just too much integrity to cheap around!
Hello,
Just a note about cheating husbands… i am a 40 year old woman who has tried to make her marriage work for 20 years. i have walked threw the fiery pits of hell and made it back again only to find out he was at it again. over and over the roller coaster ride. do i live do i die, do i care anymore or not? Paula Swim is her name. the woman in florence kentucky. the woman i almost took my life over. why?? because she was my husbands mistress for years. i worked so hard. the abuse both mental and physical. him not working and me working 2 & 3 jobs only for him to say i wasn’t doing enough. i cleaned, cooked,mowed,kept every thing as best i could,went on 3 to 4 hours of sleep a night for what?? because of him? for my child? for nothing… his mother knew. said nothing. just keep pushing people would say. went to counseling (in our Church) only for her to say what is it your not doing? try harder. pray more. god will not put more on you than you can handle…she would say…
online games, with friends list 99.9 of them women. he stays up all night with them playing games even still. all while my hair falls out, my nerves are a wreck, my memory fails because i can’t think any more, blood pressure is so high. doctor says i need to be in the hospital. wow no kidding doc. i can’t i will lose my home. work is where i must be. shattered, chewed, torn and broken i am, but keep the smile and pretend all is well. dui’s he has had. wrecking my car not his. he sits and does nothing oh wait…i am wrong he did check the mail today. no more i can take. i want to leave, out, free and maybe some sleep and peace. oh wait a minute i can’t i have no credit now. i tried to get a place. turned down because of damanged credit no thanks to him. i tried to do it all. i can not. so MRS. Paula Swim do me a favor and please come get him. a bow i will place on his head, bags i will pack, oh and could you ask him to return my bed. he took it to his grandfathers to punish me . he took the couch and me well the floor. thats fine to just take him you WHORE. Paula Swim is her name Florence Kentucky is where she calls home.
Anywho, i must go. the fight is done. i will lose my home. ya know it’s really not that bad. God does have a plan. he just gave me my out. no home. i will be ok. this is for me to start to rebuild, to live , to see, to mend, to cry, to learn not to be so shy.
thank you for reading.
Husband left for 32 hours away he called a lot a first now calls when ever he can. He is short and doesnt talk much. Says he works a lot. He have kids and try to remain postitive about all this but upset days go by with out a word from him in my mind I’m wondering whats going on????? In my heart hoping nothing bad comes of this. Advise would be great…..Confussed worried mother who feels lost and left….
I have only been married 1 year and already I’m wondering if he’s cheating. He works out of town for weeks at a time, which I can handle considering the job he has. He has been extremely concious of his weight and what he eats, and has an obsession with going to the gym, again I can understand since he was in great shape when we met, but gained a little extra while I was pregnant with our son. He always leaves the room, or goes outside to talk on the phone but with 2 kids playing and watching cartoons, it can be hard to hear the other person talking. All of these things I can handle, and tell myself there is a reason for them all… The one thing that I can not understand is why, after only one year of being married, when we are supposed to be in the “honeymoon” stage, we rarely have sex any more. Even when the kids are at grandma’s and it’s just the two of us, home alone…there is always some reason why we “can’t”…he’s tired, he’s sore from the gym, or he just doesn’t feel like it because he’s just lost his “drive” at the ripe old age of 29!!! WTF. I can count on my fingers how many times we’ve been intimate (and I use that term loosely considering the fact that each time we’ve had sex, it has been really quick and as soon as he’s done, we’re done). It’s like he’s only doing it to shut me up (once every 2 months). I’ve tried everything. I’ve tried to initiate it by giving him a massage, and things of that nature, no luck. I’ve tried ignoring the problem, and waiting on him to suggest it, again no luck. I’ve even tried begging, or just taking it!!! NO LUCK. Which leads me to believe he could be finding it elsewhere. He assures me that he isn’t , but I learned a long time ago that once you start suspecting someone is cheating, they usually are. I just need to figure out how to prove it, or hope to be proven wrong!
to:Cat
try to talk with him asap – find the way to understand him
i am a mother of 2 boys 5&7 and i just caught my husband cheating only because the girl called my house at 1:45 in the morning then i confronted himthe next day and he admitted that he had been conversating with a girl he had met in a conveinence store he says that they just had some explicit conversations over the phone and kissed one time we have been married 4 nine yrs. and i never have ever been in a situation like this before ive known for about 4 days and i havent put my husband out due to i came from a broken home and i know what it does to kids and i just dont know what to do next can someone please give me some good sane advice i dont want to jump the gun for the sake of my boys please help!!!!!
Dear Jenn, I am so sorry to hear about your situation :(( That’s so sad and must be very hard on you. The question is: how he told you about this – was he sorry or not? DId he say it was over with the girl or not?
I have been married for 11 years. My husband is a very private man….always has been. 2 years ago, he did not have a cellphone, and we both thought he needed one. He recieved a cellphone as a gift from a female friend, but did not tell me until a few days later. I think it rather odd to recieve that kind of gift from a friend. He said that she knew he needed one, but I told him that that was not her place to decide, that it was ours. Several months later, he put a security code on the phone, and stopped having the phone bill sent via mail. He also did the same for his credit card. Could this be a sign of him cheating, or a sign of his privacy? We have 2 sons and I not sure if I have allowed this to happen to protect them. I’m from a broken home…although my parents did remarry. My husband is also addicted to porn, and said that it is nothing to worry about as he is an adult. I always thought that pron was a form of infidelity
!!! Am I wrong. Please help!!!!
Dear Latricetrice,
I am very sorry to hear about this situation with your husband. The fact that he put a code on a cell phone is a sign that he’s definitely hiding something… Most men I know like their privacy, but this step looks more like trying be secretive…
I don’t have a very good feeling about it, and that friend that gave him the phone does not sound like just a friend, dear, I am very sorry…
As for the porn, it depends on how much he watches – if it’s occasional, I think it’s OK, as most of the men like watching it when they have a chance, but if it’s on a daily basis, it’s not that good…
It’s sad that your kids might suffer too, because of your husband’s behaviour, why don’t you try to talk things over with him? An adult conversation should definitely help – he should decide wether he wants to be with his family or not. If not, maybe you two should take another chance at relationships? Especially if you are not in love with him anymore and just hanging in there for the kids.
Please do talk to him, you’ll do both of you a big favor.
Hope it turns out to be alright, sweetie.
My husband and I have been fighting a great deal… lately, he has been mentioning that he can’t wait to go away (his job often requires this,..) he says things like “he wished he wasn’t married”… during argumets.. I don’t bring this stuff up. But he certainly does.
Has has shown only this.. and it makes me wonder what is going on. Not to mention, he is always angry with the kids and clearly seems “unhappy” with any in his family.
I jump through “firey hoops” for him.. everyone at his job comments on how lucky he is…
But seriously, I don’t think he looks at it like that. I think I am merely a “cock extension” b.c I do these things…
my question,… when your spouse starts telling you things like this that clearly are hurtful, what does it really mean? He told me he didn’t mean it. But this is what he told me the last time.
and now he says things like this again.
and how likely is it that he is having some kind of affair….
thanks
bunypoo4
Dear Bunypoo4,
That sounds really disturbing… I have no idea why he might be so angry with you and the kids if you do everything for him…
Is he in his 40-ies? Maybe it’s his way to act out as a result of a midlife crisis?
You two should have a talk, but it should not sound as if you were accusing him of anything, dear, men hate that, as you know.
Wish you best of luck!