Everyone knows you shouldn’t go there, but what if you can’t help it? Who’s to say your Mr. Right can’t be her Mr. Wasn’t Right? If you’ve decided to give it a go, you have to be careful or you’ll risk losing your friend and your partner… here are my top eight tips on dating a friend’s ex!
1. Discuss it with your friend
Make sure your friend is okay with you dating her ex. If she isn’t, it would be cold-hearted to do it anyway, and you risk losing a friend. Tell her first, and ask her how she feels. Explain what the attraction is, and try to read how she reacts.
2. Allow cool-off time
If they have only just split up, leave it a while. You don’t want to be his rebound girl, and your friend needs to be over him, too. Let all the raw feelings settle before you stir things up again.
3. Don’t feel guilty
If you’ve both decided to go for it, don’t feel guilty. It isn’t your fault, and while you should be respectful of your friend, you’ve done nothing wrong as long as you asked her first.
4. Is it worth it?
Consider who comes first. Would you sacrifice your friend for him, or is she worth five of him? Make sure you both want the same thing, and that you aren’t needlessly hurting people. If you can’t see a future with him, find another man for now.
Me and my friends have like the SAME taste in guys. We’ve all dated the same guys as each other. And sometimes there were a few fights…but they all worked out. We were all pretty much over the guys before another dated them. But that was back in the day. we all look back on it and laugh because we all had the exact same taste in guys….funny how that works out.
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Hey Rose,
Wow really? That’s kinda weird. I don’t know…for me friends exes are off limits. Close friends anyway.
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Rose,
At least you are still friends! :)
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Sheila,
Yeah we were very close. We were usually well over the guy before the other dated them. We’re no longer as close, but we still have the same taste in guys.
Xannyyy,
Yes we’re still friends and it’s great. We’re just not as close as we once were. But i don’t think the separation has anything to do with guys.
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my friend never does any of this, and she’s dated all my ex’s and every guy i like even when she says she wont. great friend huh? then she tells one of my other friends no guy like me, well isn’t that all her fault?
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I wouldn’t reccomant this. Most people when tey split whoever took the desicion even after a period of time the attachemnt stays even if by a little bit. It happened to me and it was a nighmare!
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Hey Xannyyy,
True that. It’s just an awakward situation for everyone to be in.
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Hmm I don’t think this is a territory I’d choose to enter…
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Meream,
I agree with you now. I used to date people my friends had. But i have grown close to some new people, and i would never do that anymore!
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Rose,
Well to each his own I guess. I don’t think I could do that to my freinds. Also if any of them did that to me, I’d tear her eyes out.
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Hey Simone,
Sorry to say this but to me it doesn’t really sound like your friend is much of a friend!
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