I think mother-in-laws get a bad rap. Not all of them are wicked, sinister, controlling, and mean… I’m sure they can also be sweet, kind, and friendly… not sure how to win over your own MIL? Here are 7 ways to impress your mother-in-law…
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1. Ask for a Recipe
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Photo Credit: theladymargaret
Chances are, your husband fondly recalls at least one dish or dessert his mother used to make, whether it’s her lasagna or her apple pie or her potato salad. Don’t bother to try and make it the way YOU make it… instead, impress and flatter your mother-in-law by asking her for her recipe, or better yet, ask her to show you how to make it! It’s a win-win — you get to learn to make a dish your husband loves, and your MIL feels important and appreciated, and gets to remember her son as a little guy, digging in to his favorite meal.
2. Keep a Tidy House
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Photo Credit: joey_joey_joey
Even if your mother-in-law is a complete slob when it comes to her own housekeeping, she’ll never forgive you if your house is anything less than tidy. Hopefully, she won’t be the type to run a white-gloved finger along your mantle to look for dust… but when you know she’s coming b, make sure your house is neat and clean, no matter how much you hate housekeeping.
Frequently asked questions
Honestly, keeping a good relationship with your mother-in-law can make family gatherings more enjoyable and brings peace to the household. Plus, it shows your partner that you care about their family.
Start by being genuinely interested in getting to know her. Ask about her favorite hobbies, or offer to help with things she enjoys. Simple gestures go a long way!
I'd suggest starting small, maybe a warm smile or a compliment here and there. Eventually, perhaps invite them to a casual dinner where you feel comfortable.
That's okay! Focus on shared interests, even if they're small, like a mutual love for coffee, or listen to her stories with genuine curiosity. Everyone loves being heard.
Oh, definitely don’t try too hard or be insincere. Authenticity matters! Also, avoid controversial topics that could lead to tension.
3. Admire Her
Did your mother-in-law just get a new haircut, kitty cat, dress, or rug? Notice these things, and be sure to comment on them. Make a sincere comment, too, because she’ll know if you’re not being genuine.
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Going beyond superficial compliments, take an interest in her interests. If she’s taken up gardening, ask about her favorite plants or offer to help her with weeding. When she mentions a book she’s reading, engage in a discussion about it, or if she’s into cooking, compliment her on a dish she’s prepared and ask for the recipe. This level of attention shows that you value what’s important to her, and it will resonate on a deeper level, helping to create a stronger, more personal connection.
4. Ask to See Photos
Come on, admit it. You’re curious to see what your husband looked like when he was a baby, and in kindergarten, grammar school, and junior high. Ask your mother-in-law to see photos, and she’ll be delighted to spend an hour going through his baby book and school photos with you.
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Seeing those old photos won’t just give you a glimpse into his early style choices (or lack thereof), but it’s a fantastic avenue to hear stories and share laughter. And trust us, every mother adores reminiscing about their child's milestones and quirky moments. Plus, it's not just about making a great impression; it’s also about connecting on a personal level. By showing genuine interest in your husband’s past, you’re signaling to your mother-in-law that you cherish where he comes from. And who knows? You might just find that his adorable toddler grin is the same one that melts your heart today.
5. Invite Her over
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Photo Credit: Jasmine Sien
Most likely, your mother-in-law WANTS to like you, if for no other reason than to brag to her bridge club about what a sweet girl you are. Give her every reason to like you by extending an olive branch and asking her over. If you only invite her for family events, where the whole family is invited, she’ll feel pushed out. Invite her for dinner, lunch, or shopping when no-one else is with you… spend some time with her!
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Creating a warm and personal connection is crucial. Show genuine interest in her life, perhaps by preparing her favorite meal or engaging in activities she enjoys. Remember, the little details matter; setting a beautiful table or a heartfelt compliment about something she's proud of can go a long way. By making her feel special and valued, you're not just winning her over, but you're also building a relationship that has the potential to enrich your family. Always listen with empathy and be open to her advice, even if you don't always take it; it's the thought and respect that count.
6. Ask Her Advice
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Photo Credit: *midtownsky*
Every mother-in-law, in fact, every woman, likes to be asked her opinion. On everything, from child-rearing to cooking to stain removal to which shoes look best with your LBD. Ask your mother-in-law for advice, and take her suggestions and opinions seriously. This will show her you respect her… which she’ll love.
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Seeking your mother-in-law's guidance suggests that you value her wisdom and experience, which can be quite flattering. Take the opportunity to engage her in deep conversations, particularly in areas where she excels. Listen attentively, and even if you don't follow through with every piece of advice, acknowledge her input. This thoughtful exchange nurtures mutual respect and can pave the way for a more harmonious relationship. Remember that it’s not just about making idle conversation; it’s about forging a genuine connection that's built on trust and appreciation.
7. Treat Her Son Well
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Photo Credit: califree
The most important thing you can do to impress your mother-in-law is to treat her son well. Every mother wants her son to have a lovely, faithful, devoted wife… so if you’re all of those things, she’ll be sure to adore you!
Most mother-in-laws are just afraid of losing their sweet little son, and want the best for them… and you’re so wonderful, if you follow these tips, she’s sure to love you! What’s your relationship with your mother-in-law like? How did you impress her? Please let me know!
Top Photo Credit: Scriblerus
Comments
ayu: nice advice, i will work on that to impress my future mil :)
Lisa: It makes so much of a difference though when you start your relationship with a mil who is neutral about her opinion of you rather than one who dislikes you. There are many reasons why she might dislike you, your jog, racism, classism, an unwillingness to let her son grow up and 'not need her anymore'. It was quite painful when an ex of mine's mother refused to meet me after her son and I had gone out for over a year and once called me "the flavour of the week" (the ex told me).
Xena: me n my bf were going on for last 5 years. Now we have done court marriage. Initially my mil liked me a lot. But when she came to knw that we were planning to get married, she started hating me. She told tht d day we gt married she wil kill me. I dont knw hw to disclose d fact tht we are married.
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