By Luann Dawkins
I was at a party the other night with my husband and was in a nice conversation with two women I had just met. My husband (lets call him Barney) was standing behind me conversing with the husbands of these women and had also just met them. Of course when a wife is within earshot of her husband she always has one ear on his conversation, we have to make sure he is not divulging state secrets about our household or making a fool out of us. So, I was listening to his story and low and behold he said the words….MY WIFE DOESN’T WORK!!!!
I had never heard that bit of filth roll off his tongue before, so naturally I was stunned! What does he mean “I don’t work”??? Does he not realize what a massive undertaking it is just to get him all he needs and desires in his daily life? Apparently not.
The ride home was silent, save for the ever annoying, “what’s wrong?” That went on for at least 5 miles to which I replied, “nothing, I’m fine.” I decided when we arrived at the house, I would have ample time in my nightly bath to simmer and plot my revenge. I gave great thought to cleaning the toilet with his tooth brush, adding an entire bottle of starch to his underwear, and putting salt in his coffee instead of sugar. But then I realized that none of those things would change his perception of what I do. Although they sure would be satisfying!!!! Instead, I decided to give his a little taste of my daily life.
On the following weekend I was mysteriously struck with a debilitating case of stomach flu! “What a shame I’m so ill Barney, I had so much that has to be done this weekend, do you think you could change your plans and pitch in with the household chores?” Like moth to a flame Barney bit. “Sure I can help, you just rest and leave it all to me.” “Oh, Barney you are such a dear, Thank you.”
I chuckle as I write this because that was the sweetest weekend of my married life. I made sure Barney never got to sit down for more than two seconds at a time. He went to the grocery store, did the laundry, dusted, vacuumed, cleaned the kitchen, bathrooms, and changed sheets, weeded the garden, bathed the dogs and three cats (that was particularly amusing), cooked breakfast lunch and dinner. And as if on cue, my son threw up all over the carpet. Yes, Karma can certainly bite you in the rear.
A wise word to all the Barneys’ of the world, when in conversation with others do not ever say anything about your wife that is not first sent to committee, voted on and approved.
Kind of funny that you had him do a whole week’s worth of work in 2 only days… if you stretched it out over 7, i’m sure he wouldn’t have found it so challenging.
Probably not, but the point was made, non the less.
I don’t think my husbands job is any more challenging than the work i do at home. he has it in his head that it is, therefor i needed to level the playing field. If truth be known, the only part of the above that i don’t do daily is the shopping, bathing the animals, changing sheets and weeding. the rest is daily and can take the entire day to accomplish. keeping a household, a demanding husband, and children going is not an easy job, but for some reason has become a thankless one in todays society. i was just trying to impart a little humor into my otherwise tedious day
What a biatch you are. I'll give you some work you dirty whore
obviously the only comments were from two bitter men that don’t appreciate women’s roles in the home.
they are probably the ones that sit around and expect the women to wait on them hand and foot while they watch tv and probabaly never clean up after themselves.
when men go to work, they usually have one job, they focus on that job when they are there and then they come home and they are done.
on the other hand a women’s work is never done especially with children. we are always cleaning, cooking, shopping, washing the clothes, playing nurse, teacher, referee, therapist, and hardly get time for ourselves. we start work as soon as we get up in the morning and work until we go to bed at night. sometimes we even have to get up in the middle of the night! the men have no idea because they are snoring away..hahahaa!
some guys are smart enough to know all this but some guys are pigs like the guys who made those comments above.
women are very giving naturally and do a lot more that you realize men! yes, there may be some lazy ones out there but as a rule they are mostly productive. some even have jobs on top of housework! so the men should really help them out in these cases.
anyway…to say a women that is a housewife does not work is not a true statement to any degree!! maybe he should have she does not do “secular” work. hahahaaaa!
So just so I get this straight instead of trying to talk to him and explain how much you work at home instead you fake an illness(lying) and made him do extra work ontop of his job and even more than what you normally do(lazy). Wow your husband is right you really don’t work on nothing, but pleasing yourself.
What a fu.cki.ng cu.nt you are, that’s why I’m staying away from marriage, women usually turn into complete cun.ts. Why not talk to him about the issue and how much it bothers you instead of plotting a revenge ? jesus christ I wish I were gay sometimes.
Yes I’m a guy but doing that to your husband just for saying those words is mean, it shows you don’t really care about him, and the fact that he offered himself to do all the household chores means he cares about you.
If you don’t have a job then YOU DON’T WORK.
I agree that you should always discuss things and have open communication. That should always be the rule, but to say “If you don’t have a job then YOU DON’T WORK” is a bunch of horse shit!
YOU try to stay home and take care of 2 small children, cook breakfast lunch and dinner, wash the clothes, clean the house, go grocery shopping, etc… If you had to pay someone to do all that you probably couldn’t afford it! What a chauvanistic pig to make such a stupid statement!!
It’s a good thing you are staying away from marraige because no woman in their right mind would agree with you. If you ever do decide to get married, I suggest you tell her how you feel about this subject before you tie the knot.
You obviosly don’t have a clue when it comes to running a household and you will probably never realize that until you actually do get married and have that responsibility.