All Women's Talk

7 Ways to Stay Alive in a Horror Movie ...

By Fawn

We've all seen at least one horror movie in our life time. And every time we watch one we always think the same thing: what on Earth are these characters doing? Someone falls down while running, drops something, or stops running from the chainsaw-wielding bad guy for no apparent reason. Well, I've seen enough of these horror movies to know exactly what you need to do in order to not die! The following list will help you stay alive if ever you find yourself thrown into a horror film!

1 Do NOT Split up

Do NOT Split up Photo Credit: Forever Darling

Listen, it never worked for Scooby Doo and it sure as hell won't work for you. There is strength in numbers. What are the chances that a 110 pound cheerleader can take out a guy that's 250 pounds of sheer muscle and rage? Exactly. So stay together and stay alive.

2 Don't Go into the Woods

I know that it's a lot of temptation, but please stay out of the woods. Especially if it seems like lightning seems to be drawn to the dark looming trees. Don't go there to hide, don't go their to make out, and don't go there by yourself because there's a short cut. Remember, the killer has just as many places to hide in the woods as you do. So stay away.

3 Be a Virgin

Be a Virgin Photo Credit: gelfling89

I know that this isn't something that can be reversed once it's given up, but everyone knows that the girls that a bit more... morally questionable... tend to go first, and the virgins usually live. So if you can't help the fact that you're not a virgin, don't brag about your conquests.

4 NEVER Slow down for a Conveniently Placed Quarterback

NEVER Slow down for a Conveniently Placed Quarterback Photo Credit: Thomas Dunning Photography

We know you're tempted, you've been running from the killer for so long. Then you see Johnny, the hot school quarterback who promises to get you somewhere safe. DON'T trust him, keep running. Remember, he hasn't been around when any of the killings went down but he always seems to show up after. If you go with him you'll just be delaying the inevitable realization that he's the killer when you see the evidence in his beat up old pick up truck.

5 DON'T Go Upstairs

DON'T Go Upstairs Photo Credit: DecodingDillan

Seriously, you have a clear shot to the door, why would you even think about heading up those stairs. Once you're up there, you're stuck. You can either jump out the second story window to your death or let the killer get you because you're trapped. You've got nowhere to go but down and out.

6 Don't Get Butterfingers

Don't Get Butterfingers Photo Credit: Will Pate

You've managed to survive the killing spree and get far enough ahead of the killer with your keys in your hand. All you have to do now is unlock your door and drive off into the dawn leaving the killer in your dust. But of course, despite the fact that you could hold onto your keys throughout the entire chase scene, they fall from your fingers. Seriously? Keep your butterfingers at bay and get the heck out of Dodge.

7 Use Those Cheer Camp/ Football Camp Skills

Use Those Cheer Camp/ Football Camp Skills Photo Credit: Shookster

Do you seriously expect me to believe that in those twelve years of cheering and football camp you didn't learn anything that would help you take down a mass murderer that wants nothing more than to kill you? Flip kick him in the face, tackle him to the ground. Anything that will slow him down enough for you to get a little bit of a head start is great!

Well ladies, these are just my little ways of staying alive when being chased by a masked madman. How would you make it to the end credits? Let me know down below!

Top Photo Credit: Mareen Fischinger

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