I don’t believe the old story that women only love bad guys, and nice guys finish last. What’s wrong with a guy who treats you well? Dating is a minefield, that’s for sure, so here are some tips on how to spot which one’s a keeper, and some warning signs to know when you ought to slip out the door and run.
He shows respect for all women. Any guy who refers to women in derogatory terms is a definite no-no, as sooner or later he’ll turn that attitude on to you. However, if he is considerate to women in general, then he’s likely to treat you well.
He listens to your point of view and doesn’t talk over you. If he doesn’t agree with what you say, he won’t tell you you’re wrong, but will simply suggest reasons why he doesn’t agree. No good guy will ever put you down and continually tell you you’re wrong, especially in front of other people.
He loves his mother but doesn’t let her smother or dictate to him. Any guy who is still tied to mummy’s apron strings is not a good guy to date, even if he cares about her. Mummy will make sure that you always come second best, as she wants to be the most important woman in his life.
He likes animals and understands that your pets are important to you, if you have them. A guy who volunteers in an animal shelter gets double points in my book. If he’s a fireman and has rescued at least one cat from a tree, he gets triple points.
He likes you as you are and doesn’t try to change you. Ever read Pygmalion? If a guy tries to change you, then he is not into you as an individual, he just wants to mould you into his fantasy. A good guy is with you because it’s YOU he wants, not some idealised fantasy woman.
You are not less important than his job or friends, and he has time to spend with you. If he’d rather go out with his mates 5 times a week, and only squeezes you in once a week (if you’re lucky). Nor does he only call you when he wants sex.
If you have a crisis or major problem, he will come running to help you out or support you. Whether it’s a family problem or a domestic issue, whatever it is he can always be relied on to help out. Not because he’s ‘the man’, but because he genuinely wants to make things easier for you.
So what’s your definition of a good guy? Have you found one of the best? How do you know that a guy is a keeper or a disaster date? Any tips on how to know a great guy when you see him?
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