7 Ridiculous Halloween Costumes ...

Price: $69.99 at amazon.com
I kid you not, that’s what this costume is called. Or rather, it’s the Adult Karate Kid Shower costume. I’m not advising this costume, by the way -- the reviews are absolutely horrible, especially for that much money. Plus, I admit, I don’t get it. Maybe I need to go watch the Karate Kid again…

Price: $26.40-$32.99 at amazon.com
Yes, yes, yes! Actually, you can find costumes for all the Jersey Shore kids this year, but Snooki’s my favorite -- and this is certainly less expensive than trying to find a Snooki-esque dress from Filthy Couture or something (JWoww’s now-defunct clothing line). I wonder how many Jersey Shore spoofs I’m going to see this year. I think I’ll throw things at anyone dressed up like the Situation. Who’s with me?

Price: $54.98 at amazon.com
Again: yes, yes, yes! I love Aqua Teen Hunger Force. But oh-em-gee, seriously? Probably going to be very popular on the college Halloween set. Anyone who dresses like Master Shake, however, is bound by canon to act like a jerk, or else you’re doing it wrong. Honestly? I’d buy this just to hang in my house. But I doubt the Better Half will let me.

Price: $27.99 at amazon.com
This made me laugh out loud for real. I miss Reno 911 like crazy. You can also find costumes for other characters from the show. As it happens, most of them will cover more than Lt. Dangle’s costume. Thomas Lennon wears short shorts like no other man can -- or ever should.

Price: $42.29 at amazon.com
Prices vary on this costume, and it is on sale right now for the listed price. I can’t even believe this is an option. I used to have this guy’s thumb wrestler doll, back when I used to watch matches involving Hulk Hogan, Andre the Giant, Roddy, and Junkyard Dog with my dad. Talk about a blast from the past! Sublime or ridiculous? Ridiculous, just by virtue of the fact that the last time I even heard from this guy, he was on Robot Chicken.

Price: $32.99-$44.99 at amazon.com
I love the Addams Family. Actually, I love the Addams Family movies. Raul Julia made me want my own Gomez for a while, and Anjelica Houston is an absolute goddess. Plus, of course, a teeny, tiny Christina Ricci was adorably morbid. I know that Halloween is a time where you’re supposed to be able to stick “slutty” in front of any costume choice and it’s cool -- slutty nurse, slutty bee, slutty Creature from the Black Lagoon -- but I draw the line at Wednesday Addams. Bad! She would never show her boobs.

Price: $99.99 at amazon.com
Uhm. I wonder if it’s the Michael J. Fox Teen Wolf or the Jason Bateman Teen Wolf. What’s with all the 1980s throwbacks? I find this ridiculous only because I think the majority of people would think you’re trying to be Chewbacca dressed up as an NBA star or something. That would make me feel stupid.

Price: $48.00 at amazon.com
Hahaha! I think this is ridiculous only because I can just imagine what a couple dressed like this would be doing all night. You can even tell from the picture. He’s going to be pelvic-thrusting into her “socket” the whole night long. Seriously though, this is more than just ridiculous -- it’s ridiculously clever.

I still need some ideas for a good Halloween costume. I’m seriously thinking about the scantily clad Creature from the Black Lagoon option. Any suggestions? What are y’all going to go dressed as?