âAt the beginning of a relationship, wouldnât it save somuch time if you could just ask the guy, âHey, are you an asshole?' And the guycould say, âYeah.â Which would be okay with me, because I go out with assholes.Exclusively.â (Karen Haber)
It doesnât matter if youâre single, or seriously involvedwith someone. You can always get smarter about men and relationships. In fact, whenever you get some brilliant insight into love that changes what you do for thebetter, something else happens:
**You put yourself in the driverâs seat of your own life. **
Andisnât that much better than allowing some crazy bastard to drive you and yourlove life straight off a cliff?
Not to get too Zen aboutthis, but of course, the idea of having complete control in any area of life is anillusion. This is especially true when it comes to matters of the heart. Soplease donât misunderstand what Iâm trying to say here. The ultimate goal is NOTfor you to be in total control 24/7 of yourself, a relationship, or a man.
The goal is to steer yourself and your relationship choices with men -- or with one man in particular -- in the right direction.
How will you know when youâre steering yourself in the rightdirection?
First, youâll actually enjoy being your best, real, natural self with any man you choose. Youâll also "get it" that itâs better to be alone than settle for misery with the wrongman. And best of all, youâll be cautiously optimistic about love.
As an added bonus, youâll figure out that all men are not assholes orcrazy bastards. And if youâve developed a bad habit of chasing after the oneswho are, youâll feel motivated tobreak that habit.
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SoâŚâŚ.on this first day of 2007, what have you decided to do differently in thenext year to steer your relationship choices with men in the right direction?
If you already know what youâre going to do differently, great! Let us know what it is. Because you never know -- some other woman might beinspired by your insight.
Or, if youâre having a hard time figuring out what to dodifferently -- perhaps you even believe there is nothing you can do differently -- Iâll make it alittle easier for you.
If youâre single, finish the following statement withoutover-thinking it, and without worrying that it isnât perfect. Just cough up anhonest answer:
"This year, when it comes to men, I will [fill in theblankâŚ]."
If youâre already seriously involved with someone, finishthe following statement without over-thinking it, and without worrying that itisnât perfect. Just cough up an honest answer:
"This year, when it comes to the man in my life, I will [fillin the blankâŚ]."
There. That wasnât too bad, was it?
Now you have 52 weeksâ worth of chances to navigate more wisely through your choices about men, relationships, and other things. I hope that you bring me along for the ride.
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May 2007 be an exciting, hopeful year for you.
