Ok, here's the deal. I am a thirty five year old mother and wife. My son is ten years old and has just started the 5th grade. My husband is a great guy. I have been a professional most of my life, I have worked since the age of sixteen. About a year and a half ago I needed to stop working due to some serious family issues. This has worked out great in every area except one, that would be the vitality of our bank account. To be honest it's almost dead.
I am now faced with the reality of going back to work. To any man this is a no brainer. You need money you get a job right? So why do I feel so torn? Why do I feel like I have to pick between my mortgage payments and my family? Intellectually I know what must be done. Why do I feel like** I will be less of mother** if I am not home twenty four hours a day? My son wants me home, he has stated that. My husband wants me to work, he's been perfectly clear.
I am currently looking for employment and feeling guilty at the same time. No one ever told me that motherhood would be one of the most guilt inducing jobs I would ever have.