Beauty My Blessing and My Curse ...

I'm not really beautiful any more. I am fifty, so my looks have faded a bit, but I am still attractive for my age. Recently I lost 15kgs (about 34 pounds), got my teeth fixed and because of a nose job to correct a deviated septum several years ago and a hysterectomy that greatly improved my health two years ago, I am now one heck of a good looking woman for my age. One young man approached me in the street a few months ago to say 'madam, you are beautiful', but I don't get the same attention I got when I was young - unless I go without glasses.... I am having so much trouble at work, mainly because the other women, who are all around my age, hate me. They take everything I say the wrong way - such as the time I advised my secretary to wear something nice to an event, because I thought she'd misunderstood me and was wearing 'work clothes'. But she took it the wrong way. If I talk about dieting, and I am forever dieting, they all go quiet (because my diet of two years worked and I am as slim and shapely as a 30 year old) and they are frumpy old ladies. Like you, I was not born beautiful. I grew into it and while it was fun when I was younger, it was also difficult. People would say 'oh....poor thing' mockingly, but it can be rather difficult when no woman wants to be seen with you. It is isolating when you are bullied and not taken seriously or considered unintelligent. I would rather be beautiful than not. Sure. But it isn't as easy as it seems. Takes some getting used to.

actually your blog came up when I googled "beauty curse". I am a multi-racial, primarily african american woman. also an ugly duckling. Ive ALWAYS had problems with women...never really had a true girl friend because of my looks. first i didnt fit in because i was "the black girl" and was also chubby. well my chub became curves and my hair grew very long and am now considered attractive. I think its a curse. I have never had issues finding a man...I am married to a wonderful wonderful man but I still struggle with friends. I have no true friends even tho I joined a sorority in college for that purpose. theyre all uncomfortable or intimidated by me or jealous. I hate it!!!! im so depressed and lonely some days I want to die. even women in my family hate me. I also want to be liked and loved for more than my looks.

My tale of ugly to beautiful is quite interesting. As a child I was really cute, everyone payed attention to me. As I grew up into middle school I became ugly and stick skinny. Even my own relatives said, I used to be so cute but what happen? I was constantly back stabbed and picked on. After puberty I was pretty again, those same people who were mean to me. All tried to be my friend or hollered at me. I actually got to see how it is on both sides. That made me a better and great person. I always had very attractive friends as well, so even though I was pretty. Some of the guys would pay attention to my prettier friend and kinda ignore me. Most guys are shallow like that. Then I lost all my baby fat and my body got more developed. Those same damn people who kinda ignored me now all kiss my ass! Even the damn girls! Acting like they were the down with the old me. Either way I can't win. I would say through it all I will never trade it in. Being beautiful that is. It is a blessing and a curse. It really depends how you act, because of it. If you have a good personality and genuine, real people will see it. They will respect you so much more. Even though you're beautiful, you don't take the easy way out. Especially because, you DON'T even need it! When you're too much of a good thing. You are going to be under scrutiny! Weather you like it or not! Don't let the haters win!

Beauty can be such a curse. I was an ugly duckling in high school and became a beautiful swan in college. My family and friends tell me I grow more and more beautiful everyday. It's wonderful to hear. However, I always thought that the reason I was single was because I wasn't pretty enough. Now despite being called "gorgeous", "lovely", "attractive", "hot", "cute", "beautiful", I've realized that beauty is quite a curse when it comes to dating. Less pretty girls always have boyfriends at my university, simply because the boys are intimidated by very attractive women. These same girls give me the stink eye for being beautiful, so they hate me and it's hard to find genuine friends. Also, I live in the city. Constant hollering, hooting, honking. And wolf-whistling. Seriously boys? Grow the hell up. A woman is not a piece of meat, she's a person. My mom has also taken advantage of my new beauty and she constantly takes photographs of me and sends them to all my friends and family. Random people I don't even know comment on them. I've always wanted to be beautiful. Now that I am, I worry that's the only thing people notice about me. I'm also insecure and working on improving my self-confidence. All the attention I get regarding my looks makes me uncomfortable. When I tell family and friends I'm single, they don't believe me and think I'm lying. It's completely unfair to be judged solely on your looks. On top of all that, I'm racially ambiguous. Beauty may be in the eye of the beholder, but because people can't place my nationality easily, men of all different races (and ages :( ) hit on me. I'd like just one day where I don't have to deal with lustful stares from men and hateful stares from women. And for all the good guys out there, please approach beautiful girls! They're only looking for kind men who can appreciate their beauty BUT ALSO appreciate their personality.