There’s been a nagging suspicion in your head these last few months - something is just not right. You can’t put your finger on it, but your husband is behaving differently in many ways. The late nights at work, the long hours in front of the computer, the hushed conversations on the phone…could there be another woman in his life? Are there really ways to confirm that he is cheating without having to confront him outright and accuse him with no proof whatsoever to back your allegations? There are other telltale signs of fidelity – ones that won’t leave you feeling so guilty of spying on him in this sneaky manner. Let’s find out what these are.
Has your husband started paying more attention than usual to his appearance? Maybe he’s buying new clothes, dabbing on cologne, going in for more frequent haircuts, or shaving more often. If you notice your husband’s lifetime grooming habits have changed for no apparent reason, it might be an indication of the presence of another woman in his life – one he’s trying to attract and impress.
In the unfortunate event that your husband is physically involved with another woman, you may find your own sex life dwindling. Your husband will show little or absolutely no interest in making love to you and spurn any advances from your side as well.
Thankfully for you most cheaters make for poor liars, unless, of course, they’ve perfected the art over several years. In any case, there are way too many tiny details that will eventually slip out in the form of inconsistencies in his stories, however minor they may be. If you have a nagging suspicion in your head, one of the best ways to confirm that he is cheating is to listen carefully to what he is saying and watch out for tiny variations in his story.
At the start of a new affair, your husband will be eager to spend as much time as he can possibly manage with his new lady love. That means he’s going to scrimp on family time with you and the kids. You’ll find him spending more time at work, going away on unexplained official trips, or making plans only for himself and his ‘buddies’ on the weekend.
The natural inclination of a cheater is a desire not to get caught. And in order to keep his affair a secret, he will take to hiding his most intimate things from his partner, such as wallet, cell phone, e-mail account, bank passbook, credit card statements etc. Any unusual secrecy or demand for privacy that may not have existed between you both should send your mental alarms buzzing furiously and could confirm that he is cheating.
Looking through the finances is one of the better and quicker ways to confirm that he is cheating. Unless your husband has devised a specific hedge fund to finance his amorous pursuits, expenditure and indulgences on his lady love, such as meals, movies, hotel rooms, evenings out, and gifts are going to reflect in his financial statements.
Fidgety or nervous behavior upon being questioned about relatively innocent things, such as his whereabouts the evening before or the late hours he’s putting into work is an indication of guilt. If he snaps at you for touching his cell phone, pounces on you for rummaging through his cupboard, or blames you for not giving him personal space, you can be sure there’s trouble in paradise.
Towards the end I’d like to point out that by themselves each of these ways to confirm that he is cheating does not indicate guilt. You cannot cry “Bloody Murder!” if he comes home late every evening or weep buckets of tears if he goes off on the weekends with his buddies. However when you spot more than one of these signs or a combination of them in his life, it’s time to sit down and have a little chat with him.
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