You would be surprised to know how much time we all waste doing things that are neither useful nor relaxing. Ok, you have a job, family to take care of and tons of things to do around the house – I understand and respect that. But, where are you in all this? The list of friends is keep getting shorter, until you finally realize that you don’t have anybody to call and go out with. We all have these lonely moments so if you are facing one right now, here is how to snap out of it and start socializing again…
Write down everything you need to do during the day and calculate how much time you really spend doing each and every thing from the list. We all waste at least a couple of good hours doing things that we don’t really need to be doing like watching “just this one more TV show”. Be efficient and you will have more time for yourself and your friends.
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My mom came up with this strategy and, honestly, it works like a charm. She doesn’t have a lot of time for socializing during the working days and Sunday has always been a family day so, for her, Saturday was the only logical choice. She goes out with her best friends and whether it’s movies, gallery opening, coffee or just a few hours of private girl-talk – she always feels and looks much happier after that.
Photo Credit: Rosaura Ochoa
Chatting and posting links on your friend’s walls is not the same as going out. It can be a great pastime in those long, rainy evenings when people are not in the mood to go out but it shouldn’t become a standard practice. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not trying to underestimate the benefits of modern technology. In fact, Facebook has helped me reconnect with many people I thought I had lost. I’ve even found my childhood best friend and we started hanging out again. But, hanging OUT, not posting pictures and sharing links.
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I’m not saying you should befriend a convicted murderer, but, if you expect to make new friends, you just can’t label people as “fat”, “ugly”, “outcast” or whatnot. Now, I’m going to sound like a Hallmark card but, you have value people for who they are on the inside.
“I can’t go out now because my hair is a mess, I don’t know what to wear and…” If you want some peace and quiet just invite your best friend to come over. Turn off your phones, play your favorite tunes and spend a whole evening doing relaxing things – a cup of coffee, a facial, a manicure, a pedicure, girl talks…
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Joining a book club, aerobics class or even volunteering to work in a local shelter could be a great opportunity to meet new people that share your interests. That’s practically a win-win situation.
Are you constantly complaining? Does everything always have to be about you? Ask yourself those questions and try to give honest answers. Self-centered friend is not a good friend so, if you notice that you are trying to make every conversation into a conversation about you, it’s time to work on your social skills.
Photo Credit: Ben Sutherland
The friends of your friends could be your friends too. It does sound like a tongue twister but if you manage to connect through one person you know and become a part of the group, I guarantee this – the only thing that’s going to be twisting your tongue is a cheerful blab with a room full of people!
If you’ve spend your lunch break chatting with the colleague from the second floor, do say “Hi” the next time you walk into him/her. A simple “Hi” could turn into a longer conversation and who knows – you might even find out you have a lot of things in common. But, if you don’t say anything, you’ve just lost that buddy forever.
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Who would you rather approach to ask for something – a kind-looking person or a gloomy one? Cheer up and let your body language do the talk.
What are your favorite friendship strategies and how often do you have time to see your friends? Are you a people person or you prefer having just a few very close friends?
Top Photo Credit: TheBigTouffe
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