10 Most Common Relationship Deal Breakers ...

They may say marriages are made in heaven, but break-ups definitely happen on earth. One moment there’s love in the air and you can hear ever-so-distant birds singing. The next you’re tearing at each other emotionally and draining the lifeblood of your relationship. So what gets you to this stage of a bad breakup? Take a look at the most common relationship deal breakers.

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Forgetting to Be Faithful

Infidelity is an ugly word and when it becomes a reality, things can get nasty. Being faithful in spite of the attractive new employee in Accounting, may be difficult but it is crucial to the strength of your relationship.

No Chemistry, Biology… Nothing!

The first year, you can’t keep your hands off each other. But now things are cooling down. Your hands are now firmly in your pockets. That warm feeling in your heart doesn’t seem to make it flutter at all. Chemistry seems to have taken a back seat.

Frequently asked questions

Why Can’t You Be like Me!

Some couples specialise in change management. They try to mould each other into their own mental images of what the other should be! That’s treading dangerous ground.

Related: 10 Breakup NoNos ...

Jealousy in All It’s Ugliness

Worried that your partner is doing better than you are? You find it difficult to smile when they do well at work? These could be signals that your heart is not set right.

Insecurity

When you don’t feel good enough to be loved and pampered the way you are, then you can be sure that insecurity is at work in your life. Unless you have self worth and think yourself worthy of attention, you can’t expect to be loved.

Misdirected Prioritisation

Where does your relationship stand on your priority list? If it’s after ‘friends’, ‘parents-in-law’ and ‘neighbours’ then maybe you need to take another look at that list!

Communication Breakdown

Remember the days when you used to sit on the porch swing and just talk? Bring those ‘good ole’ days’ back. Communication is vital in building a lasting relationship.

An Unhealed Wound

If you’re not over your past and still at some level trying/hoping to get back with your ex , then don’t expect this new relationship to work. It’s already headed downhill at super speed. Sort your heart out first!

Overflowing Expectation

Avoid entering a relationship with a dozen expectations. If you do, then you’ll end up trying to match life to your mental blueprint.

Letting Yourself Go

If you know longer look anything like when you first met your partner, then you’re in troubled waters. To keep the romance alive, take care of your health and your appearance. It will keep the fire in your partner’s heart burning only for you!

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

I tried breaking up with my boyfriend of 7 years but he just wont understand ,If i tell him to go he comes back the following day and just sits without saying anything .I tried to break up with him several times but he does not understand that I am not inlove with him anymore

I was in a relationship with a girl in my class. Somewhere around october last year, she asked for a breakup. We had gone out for 3yrs already. Out of frustation and pain, I waited for 3months. When I heard nothing from her, I decided to go out with a different girl. We are actually classmates and we do everything together when in school and are even next door neighbors. She asked for the breakup during a long vaccation period. When school reopened, we came back and I realised she was still interested in me and wanted us to continue the relationship. When I mentioned I had gone in for a new girl, she wept bitterly and for about 3months, she was asking and waiting for a comeback. I told her I needed time to break up with my new girl. She agreed to give me the time. But I must admit that, within that period, there were certain things I did or said to her that were very hurting. She however forgave me when I apologised. About a month ago, her ex visited and since we are next door neighbours, they stayed in the room next to me. When I realised I was about losing her, I looked back. When her ex left, I told her I was ready to come back. She assured me she was going to make all the time for me, and break up with her ex because she did not love him.She told me he would be coming around again so when he comes, she will ask for a breakup. When the guy came, my girlfriend explained things to him and asked that they quit the relationship. To our dismay, he told my girlfriend that, it is a competition, and whoever wins, wins. He also said if only she was going to leave both of us, he would give up but if she would leave him and come back to me, he would never agree to that. Before he left, he told my girlfriend that he cannot do what she is asking him to do. He stayed for one complete weeks and you can imagine having your girlfriend in the next room with another man. My girlfriend is the type who finds it very difficult to hurt someone. When the guy comes, she gives him all her attention, ignoring me. Sometimes I really wonder if she is doing what she says she is doing. But I trust her. How best do you think my girlfriend should handle this matter so we can break away freely from this guy? Do you think this guy will ever give up? What should I do as the man at this moment in time? I really need help Fada.

my relationship now is going ppretty good but for some strange reason I'm always afraid that he might wonder 0ff & talk t0 another chick again .

Most of the time, we lose our identity when hooked with the wrong person. The person we love should not change us but should accept who we are.

um whip his ass...

Setting up expectations are needed in a relationship but these expectations need to be realistic in order to keep the relationship alive.

my girl cheated on me 3 months ago. with a friend of a friend. we were together for 7 yrs. and she did it cuz she said she didnt think i loved her anymore. to its bull i did so much for her and the only thing i could think of is that i didnt go out every nite cuz i have a day job. we went out on trips families were tight. for past 3 months ive tryed everything toget her to be with me again and that seems to be the straw that broke the camels back. i got caught lookin threw her fone and finding her round town. i knew it wood mess things up but love makes u do crazy things. sayed she needs her space but to me it just meens i want to spend time with this other guy who has no money no priorities and is like 7 yrs. younger then me... havent talked to her in a week ended with ill call u tonite and a week latr nothin. i want to call her or txt her so bad but if i do im sure it will piss her off or sge will ignore it. she sayes she needs to find herself again and redefine her existance in this world. witch all seem like excuses to me, but i have to respect it if its true... troubles cor me follow me to work -dinner table- and social life... what do i do? i knew exactly what i wanted and had myself figured out then got blind sided.... grass betternot be greener ya know?

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