By Allison Davidson
Okay, let's just go ahead and say it..... I'm menopausal. Having a hysterectomy last year has forced "the change" upon me long before I was ready for the experience. Am I grateful that my doctor was able to perform this operation and end my agonizing physical pain? Absolutely. What I wasn't prepared for, however, was the emotional drain that would follow. I've come to grips (literally) with the infamous menopausal mid-section...the already jiggly tummy now flapping about irreverently, mocking my every move. The occasional hot flashes are offset by chillness that has me reaching for a sweater when the thermostat reads 76 degrees. Lotions and potions help keep my crinkly skin somewhat softer and smoother. But why the heck am I so grouchy?!?!?
Back in the ol' PMS days, I was unabashedly weepy. I cried at commercials, books, songs...you name it. But I took a great deal of pride (!) in the fact that PMS did not turn me into a witchy woman. Well, well, well....my how the tides have turned. On most days, I am quite certain that everyone around me has made it their goal to annoy me. Why is that dog barking? Why is that husband asking what's for dinner? Why is that child asking if he has any clean clothes? What do you people want from me?!?!?!
I've tried counting to 10. I've tried counting to 100. I've tried deep breathing...in through the nose, out through the mouth.....ah........ Dangit!!!! Everybody shut up! I'm trying to breathe here!!!!
I hear the angry words lingering in the air. I look around to try and catch a glimpse of that hateful woman! But the voice, of course, is my own...convicting my spirit, breaking my heart. And all I know to do is pray - God forgive me. God save me from myself. God save my family from me! Make my words be words You want to hear - full of grace, seasoned with salt, making the most of every opportunity. Remind me of the power of my words, dear Lord. And thank You for the power of Yours.
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