8 Things NOT to Say when You Dump Someone ...

It’s happened to each and every one of us – being dumped by our other half. There’s no really kind way of ending a relationship, but guys have a knack of coming out with some pretty dumb lines. Here are 8 things you don’t want to hear when you get dumped – I also advise never using them yourself …

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‘You Deserve Better than Me’

‘You Deserve Better than Me’ Oh, stop playing the martyr. This line is right up there with the equally infuriating ‘it’s not you, it’s me’. Look mate, you may not be every woman’s dream man, but for better or worse, it’s you I love, so throwing a dumb platitude at me is NOT going to help. It’ll just make me want to kill you.

Photo Credit: **Pink Sherbet Photography**

‘You’re a Great Girl’

Oh, this really makes me feel better. I’m great, but not your kind of great. In fact, there’s probably someone REALLY great that you haven’t told me about, isn’t there …?

Frequently asked questions

‘It Would Never Have Worked Anyway’

‘It Would Never Have Worked Anyway’ So you’ve got a crystal ball and an infallible psychic ability to tell you this, have you? What you really mean is that you don’t want it to work and you haven’t got the guts to say you just want out. Now I really hate you.

Photo Credit: **ERIO**

‘I Just Don’t Feel the Same Way about You Any More’

Erm, newsflash … that’s what happens over time. Relationships change. If we didn’t come down from that early dopamine high, our brains would probably explode.

‘ur Dmpt’

‘ur Dmpt’ Oh, for crying out loud. If you’re going to drop me into the Ocean of Abandoned Girlfriends, at least have the decency to do one thing right – tell me to my face before you push me out of the plane. I suppose I should be grateful that I don’t have to put up with you mangling the English language any more just to save a tiny bit of effort.

Photo Credit: Doc Tony Photography

‘I Never Loved You Anyway’

Ooh, who’s read that you should use that old cliche ‘cruel to be kind’? You can’t be original and you can’t be honest. I am now plotting horrible revenge.

‘I’ll Come round on Thursday to Collect My Stuff’

‘I’ll Come round on Thursday to Collect My Stuff’ And on Wednesday I will be having a huge bonfire.

Photo Credit: **Gabriela Camerotti**

‘You’ll Meet Someone else’

I don’t think so. Thanks to you, and the havoc you have wreaked on my heart and soul, I now want to renounce men and become a nun. Except I’m not Catholic and don’t like early rising, so I’ll just have to become Mad Cat Woman instead. Do meet my new furry friend before you go.

What are the worst ways you’ve been dumped? Ever used any lines that made you cringed when you ended a relationship? Is there any good way of dumping someone?

Top Photo Credit: **Gabriela Camerotti**

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So rather than tell the truth ...... YOU LIE ! ..... thats a shame !

I've done this one, "I don't feel comfortable with you." Or, "We're just better of as friends."

ahhh, i remember this one: Â«i could tell you've lost interest in me anywaysÂ» um. what? -.-

Lolll. I love the way you write! :) I've actually used the "It's not you, it's me" line quite a few times. It just seems like the easier way out (if there is such a thing as an easy way out)

SO RIGHT! DUDE YOU AND JENNIFER ARE LIKE, ROLE MODELS 4 ME! youre tips rock,man!

Love this post. Insightful and funny. :D

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