8 Christmas Presents Dads Are Doomed to Receive ...

Why is it that dads receive car kits even if they don’t have a car? Is it one of those may-come-in-useful presents? Is it an appalling lack of imagination on the part of the giver? If it’s the thought that counts, buying a cheap box containing a sponge, chamois and can of polish suggests that you don’t think much of them at all.

Now, socks are definitely a useful item (unless you have no feet). But they’re not really exciting to unwrap, are they? For some reason, we think it a fun idea to buy novelty socks. Hell, I bet even President Obama had to fake enthusiasm when he unwrapped a pair of Tweety Pie socks from his girls.

This is a slight improvement on some of the other offerings here, but it depends on the type of dressing gown. You might just get away with buying a silky spotted one that Hugh Hefner (congratulations on the engagement to a woman 60 years younger … I think) might sport, but dad won’t thank you for a towelling version or one in lurid colours. At least, he’ll say it but won’t mean it.

These are definitely Not A Good Present – unless your dad spends his time lurking in joke shops. Such gifts might as well have ‘I bought this at the last minute since I couldn’t be bothered to spend even 5 minutes during the last month thinking about what you might actually like’.

Before being tempted to buy your dad aftershave for Christmas, perform the following pre-purchase checks. Does he have any in his bathroom? Is it nearly full? Have you ever smelt aftershave on him? If the answers to these questions are Yes/Yes/No, then forget it.

Most dads have a collection of Christmas ties built up over many years. In fact, a dad need never buy his own ties. The crucial question here is, does your dad actually have a job requiring him to wear a tie? If he looks as though he wants to strangle you when he unwraps one yet again, hastily tell him that his real present will be coming later and rush out to buy something decent in the sales.

Don’t. Just don’t. They are funny for about 10 seconds. Who really cares what they drink their coffee out of?

This is the male equivalent of receiving a vacuum cleaner or dishwasher. It’s essentially saying ‘this is your job – to fix things around the house’. Inside, your dad is probably seething and having an inner dialogue about gender stereotypes.

So why do you think that dads always get the same boring presents? Is it because we don’t really know them as people? Do you find your dad easy to buy for, and how do you get ideas?

Top Photo Credit: hectorthebat