10 Ways to Handle a Horrible Mother-in-Law ...

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10 Ways to Handle a Horrible Mother-in-Law ...
10 Ways to Handle a Horrible Mother-in-Law ...

Most women are blessed with wonderful mother-in-laws. However, an unfortunate few find their mother-in-laws to be unbearable. For those who find themselves dealing with a stressful mother-in-law situation, here are some helpful tips. Here are 10 ways to ahndle a horrible mother-in-law!

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1

Separate Yourself

You may find it necessary to remove yourself from the situation to give yourself time to think things through and decide on a plan to come to terms with your mother-in-law. Be up front with her and let her know you that you need a "time-out."

2

Don't Take It Personally

Your mother-in-law’s behavior is most likely not personal; some mother-in-laws would never be satisfied with their son’s choice. Because you love your husband, try to quietly put up with her.

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It's essential to remember that her challenging behavior may stem from her own insecurities or need for control, not from anything you've done. By acknowledging that her remarks or actions are a reflection of her own issues, you can detach emotionally and avoid unnecessary confrontation. Maintaining a sense of compassion and understanding, without necessarily agreeing with her behavior, can create a more peaceful atmosphere for everyone involved. Remember, you're not alone in this situation, and staying centered helps preserve your own well-being and the health of your marital relationship.

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3

Make up Your Mind

Don’t give up your power to your mother-in-law; make your mind up that regardless of how horrible she is that is will not impact your home and your ability to be a great wife and mother.

4

Husband Duty

It is your husband’s responsibility to lead the family and to protect you, even from his own mother. He should never allow his mother to make negative comments about you or to act badly towards you. Make sure he understands how you feel about the situation and his role in it.

5

Lock the Doors

Never give your in-laws the spare keys to your house. Unannounced visits are not always welcome visits, and if you or your husband give her keys, you're giving up the power of inviting her, or NOT inviting her, over.

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6

Talk to Her

Have an honest chat with your problematic mother-in-law. Fill her in on how her actions are affecting your family; perhaps she simply has no idea what her role as mother-in-law really is.

7

Two Sides to Every Story

Try to understand where your mother-in-law is coming from; maybe the situation is a gross misunderstanding or maybe she has a legitimate concern. Whatever her concern, address it and move on.

8

Always Be the Better Person

This may be difficult but never approach your mother-in-law situation in anger. Address the situation with a cool head and open mind, and always, ALWAYS take the high road.

9

Put Yourself in Her Shoes

No matter how our children are, they are still our children. Your mother-in-law may be having trouble letting her son grow up. Imagine yourself in her shoes and gain from that perspective.

10

Always Try for a Loving Outcome

TRY to make it work. Concessions may need to be made but the give and take will be worth your effort to keep your family intact. She will be a part of your family until one of you dies, so why not make it bearable until then, right?

Working out your differences with your mother-in-law may not be easy or quick, but a peaceful result is well worth your efforts. Do you really want to be the wife who draws the line and asks her mother to choose between his mother and you? Be very careful with ultimatums, you may not like the outcome. Have you ever dealt with a monster-in-law? What otehr tips can you share for dealing with a terribly mother-in-law?

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Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

I've been with my partner for 2 years and cannot stand my MIL. Its worse when the whole family are together as i am relentlessly bullied about everything from working in a library to being vegetarian. And my partner just sits there!

Well, we were lucky to have a home large enough for all of us, but we did share a kitchen. I did most of the cooking, for most of the time, so it was lots of work, but I had a chance to experiments with lots of recipes, thus a plus for me. I would not recommend this arrangement for anyone. Everyone needs their own space and privacy. Love your parents and grandparents, visit them often, help them out, let them spend time with your children, but make sure everyone has their own place to live in.

but it's harder if you live with them :( believe me. My first marriage was a disaster

There is no winning with my MIL. She continues to call me names, which really don't bother me anymore. You think of an unbecoming slang term for anything and I have been called it. She does live with us for now but this last time she started with me over a banana I told her to find another place to live. It really is ruining my marriage and im not sure how long I can do this. Ive done it for over a year now and the insults keep getting worse and the words more harsh. It really doesn't bother me she herself infuriates me. Any thoughts how to make this better?

I totally agree with your points in #7,8 and 9. My mother-in-law and father-in-law moved in with us after our 1st wedding anniversary, and lived with us for 24 years. I can't say it always was fun, since it felt like I had visitors all the time, but my children benefited from growing up with their grandparents at their side. Would I do that to my children? NO!!! I love them dearly, visit them regularly, play with my grandchildren, but then I go home to my own kitchen and my own bedroom.

yes mother in law always prefers their daugtter. they dun appreciate

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