The much talked about baby known as Jayden James Spears has been caught in the wild. The downward tilt of the head indicates he is sleeping or defecating. Possibly both. In related news, Bigfoot is dismayed blurry photos of himself no longer make the news. Consequently, his behavior has become erratic and he has begun raping deer for media coverage. Deer said to be displeased.
• Drunken Stepfather: Bijou Phillips Wears a Fake See-Through Dress? I believe she’s also naked and decapitated on the Hostel II poster.
• Bastardly: Christina Aguilera’s Monkey Turns 30!! Aaaaw! How Cute!
• CityRag: Halle Berry Crack-Ho Goodness
• Celebslam: Tony Parker is jealous Eva Longoria keeps talking cheating on him with other NBA players
• ICYDK: Richie Sambora enters rehab. People ask, Richie… Hilton? No? Then we don’t care.
• SOW: NBC wants Rosie O’Donnell. Their garbage disposal is broken.
• Celebitchy: Big Brother contestant booted for using N word in conversation
• DH: Mischa Barton Obsessed with T.A.T.U in New Movie
• Egotastic: Picture of a picture of a naked Mila Kunis
• Dlisted: Criss Angel talks about Cameron Diaz
• CS: Steve Martin Beaten as a Child
• Pajiba: Thundercats to the big screen. See, I didn’t even say “Thundercats are a go!”
• ASL: Emma Watson Likes ‘Em Sporty and Smart. Ah yes, that magical age called “Barely Legal”
• BWE: A Day in the Life of Retired Bob Barker
• AB: The Manson/Von Teese Divorce Is Getting Nasty