The dreaded sex talk. Where to start? Some parents don’t have any problem whatsoever with talking to their teens about sex, which makes this task much easier. It can be difficult to know how young a kid should be when you mention the basics of sex. What some parents might deem to be too young, others might think it’s too old. You don’t want to wait until your child has already been informed by someone else about sex. If you are wondering how to go about having this type of discussion, then you might be able to use the following 7 tips on talking to your teen about sex.
Kids are bound to have questions about sex, no matter what age they are. You can try to prepare yourself by thinking in advance how you will handle certain questions. If you have another adult that is helping with this sex talk, then maybe the two of you could tag-team on some questions. The other adult might be able to answer certain questions better or easier than you can. It also helps if the other person involved in the discussion is of the opposite sex, in order to get input from both sexes.
There is quite a lot involved with the whole idea of sex, so just stick to the basics. There’s no sense in confusing the situation.
Too many teens are hung up on their appearance and they feel they need to look like the teenagers in the fashion magazines. If girls don’t wear short skirts and low-cut tops they think boys won’t like them as much. Be sure to explain the difference between liking someone for their appearance and liking them for who they actually are and that there is a huge difference here. Boys and girls need to know how their body image is attached to sex and the affect it has on the opposite gender at times.
STDs, pregnancy, emotional turmoil, and physical stress are just a few of the consequences that can arise. Sure there are consequences that don’t seem like a bad thing, once your child has reached an appropriate age. If your teen knows about the facts of life early on and how to avoid these negative consequences during high school, then maybe they will have a much more fulfilling sex-life once they reach a more mature age. Let your teen know there’s plenty of time for sex later and that he/she should focus on enjoying being a teenager at the moment.
Talk to your teen about peer pressure and how going out on a date with a person isn’t synonymous with sex. Too many teens who are just beginning to hit the dating scene are under the assumption that sex is mandatory when going out on a date. This can be frightening for some and cause extreme anxiety. Discuss ways to remain safe on a date.
It’s important for your teen to know what types of sexual feelings to expect, if he/she is at the preteen age. It’s also good for a teen to be able to recognize that his/her feelings are perfectly normal and there’s nothing to be ashamed of. If your teen can deal with sexual feelings in a mature manner, then confidence will most likely follow. Being unsure if what you are feeling is normal is always a bit scary. Reassurance is the best thing you can provide.
Let your teen know that you are always available to answer questions or talk about anything he/she needs to discuss in regards to sex. Keeping the discussion light should make it a bit less stressful on you both. Sometimes your teen might just need to voice an opinion or work out ideas out loud, but not need feedback. Allow your teen to talk about whatever he/she needs to in order to keep questions about sex out in the open. It’s much better than having your teen run to an unreliable source for this type of information.
These 7 tips on talking to your teen about sex are fairly general. You should know your own child well enough to know how in-depth your discussion on sex should go. Your kid may be at the age that very little information is needed right now, so there’s no sense in overwhelming him/her with vivid details. How were you given the talk on sex when you were a teen?
Top Photo Credit: _Rayo Celestial_
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