10 Silly Newspaper Headlines ...

By Alison

10 Silly Newspaper Headlines ...

Have you ever seen one of those headlines that made you think "they should have read that before going to press?" There are some wonderful errors and double entendres that could have been avoided with a little rewording …

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1

Random Killer Hangs Himself

Random Killer Hangs Himself Photo Credit: Direct Annuaires Stephan Comelli
This was a headline seen by myself some years ago in a London paper. I have been laughing about it ever since. Imagine this. The killer picks his victims at random. Let’s say, he flicks through the phone book and stabs a name with a pencil. Oops. That name looks familiar. But he has to stick to his modus operandi … so goodbye to the Random Killer …

2

30 Year Friendship Ends at Altar

30 Year Friendship Ends at Altar Photo Credit: Guida

Yup. That happened to me. I was friends with my ex for years before we got married. I don’t think we made the papers though. Clearly you should only marry someone you already dislike, then no friendships can be ruined.

3

Ban on Boxing after Death

Ban on Boxing after Death Photo Credit: oregonianphoto

Quite right. I mean, zombie boxers? Vampire boxers? There are rules, you know …

4

Hospitals Are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors

Hospitals Are Sued by 7 Foot Doctors Photo Credit: Oxfam International

Oh my God! The attack of the 7 Foot Doctors! Here they come, whirling stethoscopes and brandishing clipboards. The terror, the terror …

5

Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years at Checkout Counter

Two Sisters Reunited after 18 Years at Checkout Counter Photo Credit: Will Survive

They must have been waiting behind that annoying person who fumbles with their wallet, has several credit cards declined, takes forever to pack their groceries, decides they don’t want something after all … Was one sister waiting for the other? Why didn’t she come and check why her sibling was taking so long? Did they ever eat the food they bought (which would have been somewhat out of date by the time they got it home)?

Famous Quotes

Love is like a friendship caught on fire. In the beginning a flame, very pretty, often hot and fierce, but still only light and flickering. As love grows older, our hearts mature and our love becomes as coals, deep-burning and unquenchable.

Bruce Lee
6

March Planned for Next August

March Planned for Next August Photo Credit: Christiane*

I agree wholeheartedly. It’s time for a change. Let’s give people with March birthdays a chance to celebrate in summer and enjoy a birthday barbecue, instead of rain and cold weather.

7

Reagan Wins on Budget, but More Lies Ahead

Reagan Wins on Budget, but More Lies Ahead Photo Credit: jcolman

Wouldn’t it make the headlines if a politician actually told the truth?

8

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant

Juvenile Court to Try Shooting Defendant Photo Credit: NB77

I suppose that might just work as a way of preventing crime. There’s one young person who’ll never reoffend …

9

Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years

Killer Sentenced to Die for Second Time in 10 Years Photo Credit: Joe Gratz

How many lives has he got?

10

Patient at Death's Door - Doctors Pull Him through

Attack of the 7 Foot Doctors – the Sequel.

These are the funny headlines that caught my attention. What headlines have made you giggle?

Top Photo Credit: Brandon Dolan

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

LOL.......Random killer hangs himself and ban on boxing after death.

Buhahahahha. Die for a second time! Classic :D

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