Are you too busy to carry an umbrella? Are your head and shoulders continuing to get wet despite every effort to keep them dry? Do you like looking like a total tool? Then you, my busy, wet, tool of a friend, are in luck.

Meet the Nubrella, the new umbrella for people that don't get smacked enough. It's sleek and futuristic and uses shoulder straps instead of a pole. Personally, I'm a pole man. Wait, what were we talking about?

Right, the ...