7 Tips to Not Be over Protective to Your Children ...

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Some parents are over protective due to guilt they carry with them. Maybe something happened to a child when he was little that a parent has always felt responsible for. This guilt causes the parent to try and overcompensate by keeping the child from ever having that negative experience again. For instance, if a child fall off of his bike and breaks his arm, an over protective parent would never let the child ride the bicycle again. This causes the child to miss out on an important part of childhood and many fond memories of riding his bike with friends.

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It’s hard to see your child fall down and not rush to his aid. However, the more you do this, the less likely it will be that he actually learns to solve his own problems. He will begin to expect someone to help him every time. Bullying at school can be a traumatic experience, but teaching your child the proper steps to take can show him that there is an alternative to hiding from said bully. As kids grow, they have new problems that need to be conquered. Showing them how to resolve little problems can ultimately teach kids methods of fixing larger ones later in life.

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There’s no need to run a household like a master drill sergeant. Be a bit lenient on some things, such as allowing a few minutes leeway when a curfew is set. The only time this can become a problem is if your child starts extending the time limit to the point of it being ridiculous. When being late becomes a regular habit, then the situation should be addressed. It’s better to give a little slack and have your child home safely, than to be so rigid that he is in an accident trying to make the curfew. Lenience is necessary with other aspects of life as well; choices in friends, homework situations, and even when making personal decisions.

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When you can trust your kids to make the right decisions, then it seems like it is easier to be less protective of them. There’s less need to try and monitor every little move, which eases the tension between both of you. A strong sense of trust will improve your child’s self confidence, thus providing you with less need to worry about every detail of your child’s daily living. The hardest part is establishing the initial trust, especially if your child has given you any reason to doubt him.

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The more you talk to your child, the better you’ll get to know him as a person. Talking about important situations or even just general conversation allows you both to become more in tune with one another. Part of effective communication is listening, which means you need to be a good listener as well. Let him tell you his thoughts before you jump to any conclusions. This will enable him to feel much more comfortable with sharing information with you. One day you will realize that he is very good at reasoning and able to function effectively in a variety of situations, without needing your assistance.

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Provide your child with the tools necessary to succeed in life and then let him adjust as needed. You can’t force your kids to do things. People often feel the need to bully or bribe their child to do what they feel he should be doing. This won’t make him an independent individual. Instead, he will learn that harshness is the answer to getting what you want. As your child becomes more independent, hopefully you will feel less need to protect him from every little thing.

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It’s alright for kids to try and do some things all on their own. I know it might be scary at times, but as long as you teach your child the correct way of doing certain things then he should be alright. Give your kid the benefit of the doubt and let him make some mistakes. This is how most people learn. Kids also tend to learn quickest this way. You can be there to guide them through the initial process, but try not to hold their hands the entire way.

I hope these tips are useful to you. Parents tend to want what’s best for their child, but it is possible to be so overbearing that you end up pushing kids further away. Do you feel that you are overprotective of your child? Which of these 7 tips to not be over protective to your children did you find to be the most helpful?

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