A friend of mine’s son was having trouble with the monsters in his room. I sympathise. It seems we had a monster infestation for a while, there. But we got rid of them.
My son would ask if there were any monsters in his room, and I’d always say, “Nope.” Which would be followed by that inevitable toddler question, “Why?”
Well, I kept looking for answers to that question. Sometimes, the monsters had gotten tired of waiting for him to come, and so they’d gone to a friend’s house to play. Sometimes, their monster mothers had called them home to eat supper. Sometimes, the monsters had been rude, so I kicked them out. Sometimes, they’d gotten in the way of my housework, so I vaccumed them up. Once or twice, they had fallen asleep waiting for the kid to come home, and so I’d sent them off to their monster houses to be tucked in.
He stopped being afraid of monsters right quick.
But my friend’s son was more persistent in his monster spotting. So the other night, they stopped by the local Marvelous Market to purchase a rather strategically placed (thanks, Seth!) can of Monster Repellant, which they purchased (parents, get yourself a can of compressed air, used to clean computer components). Once home, they sprayed the Monster Repellant around the room, and then vacuumed up every last bit of monster residue and threw it away. The little guy hasn’t found a monster since.
And a local market just made a very loyal customer out of me.