All Women's Talk

8 Positive Ways of Remembering a Late Loved One ...

By Alison

At some point in our lives, all of us will face the sadness of losing a loved one. I’ve been through bereavement, and I still feel the loss every day, even after many years. However, I feel that one way of doing justice to the memory of someone you love is by remembering them in positive ways, such as the following examples …

1 Laughter

LaughterPhoto Credit: Kungfukitten

When I’m gone, I’d much rather that people remember the things about me that made them laugh, than cry over me. Recently, on my late father’s birthday, my sister and I had great fun recalling funny anecdotes (apparently he used to swear at the referee when they went to soccer matches). I find this image so hilarious, as I never even heard my dad swear at all!

2 Following in Their Footsteps

Following in Their FootstepsPhoto Credit: lorytravelforeverॐ༽

Is there a particular quality you admired in your loved one, or an achievement that you were proud of? Try to emulate their attitude – it doesn’t mean that you have to become a doctor if they were one, but rather that you approach what you do with the same enthusiasm and commitment.

3 Images

ImagesPhoto Credit: latarnia_morska

Have some photos of your loved one on display and watch videos that feature them. We have old photographic slides of the family, so we get the projector out occasionally. That’s guaranteed to cause much hysteria looking at the dated fashions and hairstyles!

4 Teaching

TeachingPhoto Credit: Dalla*

If you have children, one of the best ways of remembering your loved one is to pass on the same positive values that they taught you. Recall what traits you most admired, and teach them to others.

5 Celebrate

CelebratePhoto Credit: Kathy~

I think about my dad every day, but like to remember him in a special way on his birthday. I’ll listen to music that reminds me of him, or watch a favourite film of his, and just quietly remember him.

6 Bring Them Alive

Bring Them AlivePhoto Credit:Mike Bailey-Gates

My nieces never met their grandparents, but we talk about them and make them real people, not just names. Even children want to know where they come from, and talking about their ancestors brings them alive.

7 Memorial

MemorialPhoto Credit: Don3rdSE

It can be very helpful to have a special site that reminds you of your loved one. This can be a place that meant something to the family, or a corner of the garden dedicated to them. A family gathering on significant dates to chat about them and mark the day can also be a positive way of remembering them.

8 Achievements

AchievementsPhoto Credit: geckoam

Whenever you achieve a goal, such as pass an exam or learn to drive, or make a positive step in your life, think of how proud your loved one would have been of you. I find this gives me an incentive to do more, or makes me feel very pleased with what I have achieved.

How do you like to remember people you have lost? Do you also believe that we should recall the positive things about them, rather than grieve (although that is something that cannot be avoided)?

Top Photo Credit: JenniPenni

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