Crushes happen all over the place – and they can even happen in the office. This can be tricky, however, since a lot of workplaces frown on office romances. Crushes on a colleague have the potential to get messy as well, for a variety of reasons. There are so many things to consider, but here are some techniques that can help you handle a crush on a co-worker.
1. Stay Professional
Above all else, you have to stay professional in the workplace. If you start behaving in an unprofessional way, then things can get very bad very quickly. By acting professional, however, you can keep things in perspective … and make sure that you keep your job. This is especially important if you don't want your crush to know about your feelings.
2. Don't Let Him/Her Walk All over You
Some people are more than willing to take advantage of your crush feelings. And it is human nature to sort of dote on people you like and care about, so you might be tempted to buy your crush lunch or coffee, pick up his or her dry cleaning, and so on. Furthermore, your crush might be perfectly willing to reap the benefits of that, even if he or she doesn't necessarily feel the same way. That's never awesome.
3. Look the Right Way
What this means is, you should try to avoid staring dreamily at your crush while you're at work. Moony stares can reveal your feelings quicker than almost anything else. Besides, it's unprofessional to stare like that – and it could lead to trouble.
4. Keep up with Reality
When you have a crush on someone, it's not at all uncommon to start fantasizing or even dreaming about that person. It's also not uncommon to start confusing those fantasies with reality, especially when you work with your crush – after all, you spend so much time together. It's important to keep your feet firmly rooted in reality, though; keep your fantasy life completely separate from your professional life.
5. Be Realistic
To that end, you also need to be realistic. How does your company feel about office romances? Does your crush give any inkling about feeling the same way? Do you really think a relationship could happen? Don't let your feelings get in the way of your common sense. Stay level headed and make sure that you keep things in a realistic perspective.
6. Keep Cool
You need to act as cool, calm, and collected as possible. Don't get gushy or giggly, don't let your crush affect you like that. If need be, pretend like your crush isn't there at all, especially if that's what you have to do to keep things on a professional level.
7. Weigh the Consequences
If you really think you want a relationship with your crush, you need to start thinking about the consequences. Will it put your job in jeopardy? What happens if you break up? You need to think about what working conditions would be like both during and after a potential relationship. If the cons outweigh the pros, then again, keep your fantasy life completely separate from your working life.
Sometimes office romances do work out, but when they don't, it can get awkward even when you don't want it to. Things like that just happen, and it's rarely like what you see in the movies. Have you ever acted on a colleague crush before?
Top Photo Credit: Corporación DOMOS
Frequently Asked Questions
- What should I do if I have a crush on my coworker?
- Honestly, it can be tough when you have feelings for someone you work with. Try to keep things professional and set some boundaries. Maybe grab coffee with friends after work to distract yourself.
- Can having a crush on a colleague affect my work?
- For sure, it can be distracting! It's important to stay focused on your tasks. Maybe set clear priorities and take regular breaks to help refocus.
- How do I tell if my coworker might like me back?
- Ah, that's tricky. Look out for signs like if they go out of their way to talk to you or laugh at your jokes. But remember, work comes first!
- What's the best way to get over a crush on a married coworker?
- That's a hard one! It's best to respect their relationship and focus on maintaining a good professional connection. Try engaging in activities outside of work to help move on.
- Is it okay to tell a coworker that I have a crush on them?
- It depends on the situation. Consider the dynamics and possible consequences at work. Sometimes it's best to keep it to yourself, but if you really feel the need to share, be prepared for any reaction.