Howard Stern Basks in Imus's Shame ...

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Don Imus’s racist remarks about the Rutgers University women’s basketball team have caused plenty of anger and sadness among right-thinking people, but they have brought unspeakable joy to one person: Howard Stern.

The shock jock-in-chief’s orgy of schadenfreude reached a crescendo yesterday as he celebrated his bitter rival’s public shaming on his Sirius Satellite Radio show. Stern devoted a large portion of his show to the topic, repeatedly playing clips of Imus’s penitent appearance on Al Sharpton’s talk show. Some of Stern’s choice jibes after the jump …

• “He does nothing. He mumbles, he can’t speak English, he can’t be understood. He was never funny. You listen to the show, I defy you to laugh.”

• “He’s completely insane.”

• “Go away. Really. It’s time.”

• “There’s probably a 70 percent chance [CBS Radio and MSNBC are] going to have to fire this guy…. He’s in for a shitstorm because the girl’s basketball team is going to have a press conference, and that’s going to look real bad.”

• “I guarantee you the wife leaves him. If he loses his job, she leaves him within a year. [And if that happens,] I will leave Beth to fuck her.”

• “If it was me and I did something stupid like that I would just go on and say, ‘I’m not going on Al Sharpton’s show. Al Sharpton is a piece of shit. He’s just a human being that is bankrupt, and he should pay his bills…. I would rather just leave the radio than apologize to that man…. I like Al Sharpton, by the way.”

• “I mean, come on, Al Sharpton. Imus, get some fucking dignity.” [Burps.]

• “I’ve never seen a 67-year-old guy look that bad.”

• “Imus is a moron.”

• “Imus had a perfectly nice life, he had no listeners. No one ever bothered him. Now all of a sudden he’s getting all this attention, he’s cracking. He handled that like shit.”

• “How is Imus on the radio? Do you understand a word he says?”

• “He looks awful. How old is Imus for real? Doesn’t he look 80?”
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