Who the Hell is Chunky Pam?

By Editor

Who the Hell is Chunky Pam?

Hi ladies,
Happy New Year! That's me and Adam on New Year's Eve, though the picture hardly represents how fabulous my dress was (it was a low-cut, mini shirtdress with dolman sleeves and an empire-waisted sash...HEAVEN. My sweet hubbie purchased at our friends' boutique in Manhattan's trendy Nolita District--it's called Sweet Tater, and if you're in town, check it out!) Oh, I missed you to pieces!! How were your holiday festivities? Are you feeling renewed, refreshed, and ready to be the star you are in 07? How much did you love Dreamgirls (“one night onleeee…”)? And most significantly, who saw that bizarre Chunky Pam, mini-video on MTV over the holidays?

I’m haunted by this woman, and here's why. This year I’d decided to give Adam an extra-special pre-Christmas surprise. So I got all dolled up in this teeny-tiny, fluffy, fuchsia Victoria’s Secret Santa miniskirt (yep, that's it), Devi Kroell stilettoes and a little wifebeater that said “Sexy Little Me,” waited till he came home from work, and broke out in a warbly rendition of Santa Baby. He laughed till he cried, which was not exactly the effect I was going for…but more disturbingly, CHUNKY PAM rocks the very same Santa skirt in her video! The nerve. Even worse, last week Adam went to a bachelor party where a “gentlemans” club was obviously involved, and he said ALL the strippers were wearing my Santa skirt. Way to sully my do-you-think-I'm-a-nasty-girl moment. New Year’s resolution #1: Next time I attempt to spontaneously sex it up, shop at some obscure, extra-upscale boutique where Chunky Pam and a passel of pole-riders are less likely to bite my style.

And now, in lieu of the New Year, I've assembled a bunch of key beauty resolutions we should all stick to in the upcoming months. If you can think of any more, leave mama a comment and I’ll post the best ones in my next entry. Let's do '07 BIG, Pretty Girls! Here’s to another year of smoky eyes, lip-plumping glosses and trimmed ends!!

Big mwah on both cheeks,
Tia

Resolution #1: I WILL NO LONGER SUFFER THE SMUDGE
I can't even tell you how many of my SYB'ers have asked me what to do about mid-day eyeliner smudging. It's really so annoying--you leave the house with the fiercest eye moment, but by three pm, your liner has done more traveling than Brangelina. Just FYI, this phenomenon is really normal...eyelids are naturally oily, hence the smearing. But why suffer the smudge for another year when the eye makeup gods have invented E! Solutions Liner Last ($20)? This stuff is all the rage among beauty insiders. You just layer it over any kind of liner--liquid, pencil, shadow whatever--and it seals it in place all day long. And it's waterproof, too!

Resolution #2: I WILL EMBRACE ALTERNA-SCENTS
In the "Oh Siete," traditional perfume--you know, the spritz-and-rub kind

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