1. You Feel Absolutely Defeated
No matter why you're moving back in with your parents and no matter how much support you get for it, you just feel defeated. You're a grown up, you're not supposed to have to go back home again, and you're just not quite sure how you reached this point.
2. You Stop Feeling like an Adult Almost Immediately
This occurs for several reasons, as you shall see. Plus, to some extent, every kid regresses a little when they return to their parents' home, even if it's just for a visit. They are The Parents. You are The Child. It is the Circle of Life.
3. Your Parents Feel Exactly the Same Way
This occurs for several reasons, too – as you shall also see. It's that parenting instinct, I think. Once you cross that threshold, they are The Parents and you are The Child.
4. You're Not above Referring to Your Parents as Your “roommates”
Especially when you're in public. You don't exactly want to broadcast the fact that you're living at home again. You start to identify with Nick Swardson in Grandma's Boy a little too much.
5. You Try so Very Hard to Live by Their Rules
Because it's the respectful thing to do and you know that. You're so grateful, you're happy to follow their rules … as long as they're reasonable, is the thing.
6. Your Parents Start Getting a Little … Parenty
Suddenly, it's like all those intervening college years never happened. Little by little, your parents start parenting you again.
7. Your Mom Tries to Give You a Curfew Again
The first time your folks ask you where you're going, you think it's charming – until you realize they're totally serious.
8. They Always Want to Know Where You Think You're Going
You're like, “You don't own me! I'm a grown-ass adult! Can I get $20 for gas, please?”
9. They Start Questioning Your Plans and Habits
When you go out, they want to know why you never stay in to spend time with them. When you stay in to spend time with them, they ask what happened to all your friends. CAN YOU JUST LIVE?
10. You Learn to Put on Clothes when You Leave Your Room
This occurs after you're caught in various stages of undress on numerous occasions. One of this will probably involve you standing in front of the fridge in your granny panties, scratching your butt while you scrounge for food.
11. You Stop Eating Cereal for Dinner
At least, you stop eating cereal for dinner out in the open. You sneak it in your room so you can avoid being judged for eating Fruity Pebbles.
12. You Might Get a Little Too Complacent
Childhood habits might start creeping up on you. For example, your bathroom floor might end up covered in dirty clothes or your room might become a graveyard for crusty old dishes.
13. So You Try to Make This Whole Living Situation More … “professional”
You're more than happy to pay rent or to offer up your share of the bills. The problem is that when you offer, your parents don't even want to take your money.
14. And Your Parents Just Send You Mixed Signals
They don't want you to pay rent, but if you mess up and eat your dad's last Go-gurt, you're in for a thirty-minute lecture about how you're eating your parents out of house and home and you need to contribute.
15. You Discover That You Can No Longer Keep Odd Hours
You discover this when you wake up at noon on a Saturday to the sight of your father, looming over your bed and staring at you, a vein throbbing in the middle of his forehead.
16. Dating is a Nightmare of Epic Proportions
However, sneaking around just to make out with your boo is pretty sexy. Until you get caught. You'll get caught.
17. You Remind Yourself over and over That This is a Short-term Solution
It won't last forever. You won't be here forever. You cannot live here forever. This cannot be your life for the rest of forever. Don't worry, though. It probably won't be forever. Probably.