If “sorry seems to be the hardest word” for you too, don’t worry, you’re definitely not alone. In fact, I bet more than 50% of the world’s population has a problem with saying this simple and yet very meaningful word. Being able to say it, however, doesn’t get you off the hook either because, similar to “I love you”, “I’m sorry” can be abused and mean nothing if there aren’t any actions to back it up. That’s why I’ve came up with this list of things you can do in case you ever mess things up. So, here it is:
1. Show That You Are Sorry
The damage has been done so it wouldn’t be fair to act like nothing is wrong. I, personally, wouldn’t feel good to hear “All righty then, I’m in the mood for some coffee, shall I make one for you too? 5 minutes after I had a fight with that person. It’s like admitting you needed to blow some steam off and the person next to you was nothing more than a boxing bag for your verbal punches. Don’t be too damn proud to let your guilty look show because you are guilty and, if you don’t want to apologize, at least show that you feel bad too.
2. Admit Your Were Wrong
I, personally, don’t have a problem saying the S-word but you definitely won’t hear me apologizing for things I didn’t do! My sister, in the other hand, wouldn’t say she’s sorry even if her life depended on in. Anyways, in case you are the one responsible for the whole mess and you just can’t get yourself to say that you’re sorry, at least admit that you are the one who messed up. This is verbal so maybe it doesn’t belong on this list but hey… it goes with the it’s-my-fault attitude so let’s just call it a “verbally non-verbal way” and leave it here- Shall we?
3. Act Apologetic
My sister is the cutest little trouble maker ever! She’ll explode and pick a fight whenever she’s in a bad mood but I just can’t hold it against her - seeing her trying to be all nice afterwards is just priceless. The same goes for my dad, too! He’ll rather be all nice and purr around me like a cat than say, “I’m sorry”. But that’s okay, you know… I know that’s their style and, for me, that’s just as good as a verbal apology.
4. Don’t Make the Same Mistake Twice
This is actually much, much better than the actual “Sorry” because apologies ain’t worth a didly squat if the person keeps making the same mistake over and over again. I’ve had my fair share of the “I’m sorry” types and, let me just tell you this – I’d rather have a non-apologetic number 4 than somebody that keeps disappointing me and is always sorry! Your actions count the most so next time you’re in a similar situation, remember to do things differently.
5. Offer to do Something
Don’t ask, “How can I make it up to you?” – Do it! I’m not talking about presents or any other ways people use to “buy” the ones they have “mistreated”. I’m talking about those cute, funny things only a “guilty” person would do, like going to take the trash out instead of the other person even though it’s raining heavily or giving him/her your piece of cake even if he/she is refusing to take it. You know… actions that say, “Yes, I know, I’ve messed things up and I’m so, so, so sorry! Come on, you gotta luv me, look how cute I am and you know much I hate taking out the trash even on a perfectly sunny day.”
6. Organize a Little Surprise
What’s done is done so, unless you’ve managed to master the art of traveling back in time, I suggest you find a way to cover for the losses. Fighting is a waste of time because you could have been doing something nice instead of it. Do you agree? Every event that ended up with one side having to say “I’m sorry” is one of those bad memories so do organize a little surprise and create a nice memory to neutralize the previous, bad one.
7. Do Something Sweet Only a Child Would do
Children are so sweet and innocent; they don’t really care about material things and are ready to trade their favorite toy just to see a loved one happy. So, if your sweetheart is feeling all sad and you are the one to blame, tell her you’ll be back in five minutes, then go out , pick the first flower you see (and doesn’t require trespassing) and give it to her. You’ve had a fight with your sister and now she’s mad in her room? Give her that skirt she loves so much even though it’s your favorite one too. That’s something a child would do – not go out to buy something but sacrifice something it already has. A child would pick a flower, innocently hoping that’s going to make you stop being mad while a grownup pays for a fancy bouquet giving you the impression that he’s trying to buy its way out of the trouble.
And remember this – no matter which way you choose to offer you apologies, they must always be sincere. But just how often do you need to apologize and how do you do it?
Top Photo Credit: °Florian