What if you have been trying your best to make your marriage work? Is there really a foolproof way to ensure that you or your husband would not be having an affair?

Take a look at some of the tips that I gathered on how you can make your marriage affair-proof:

Nurture your own friendships, and allow him to have his.

You may be tagged as a couple when you get married, but you are still separate individuals with separate interests. If he can’t live without golf or bi-weekly poker nights with the guys, let him do so. Similarly, keep your own circle of friends so that you can do the activities that you’re sure he will never get into.

This way, you’ll have more freedom to become separate individuals while harnessing your marriage at the same time.

Go on dates.

Even if you’re already married, go on dates as if you were still on the boyfriend-girlfriend phase. This is especially true if you have kids to take care of. Having some quality dates together will bring back the romance in your relationship.

Be with other happy couples.

It’s much more tempting for you or your husband to stray if you hang out with singles who are still in the dating scene and who find the word commitment foreign. When you’re with another happy couple – you’ll have a deeper appreciation of the bond that you have as husband and wife.

If temptation is right in front of you – talk about your spouse.

I remember the movie “Knocked Up” where Katherine Heigl’s sister in the movie was approached by a guy in a bar. She sort of blurted out that she’s married – so it immediately killed off the guy’s advances. Isn’t that the best way to ward off a potential affair? Never pretend to be someone that you’re not and you won’t be tempted to try out other’s flavors, so to speak.

It may be harder than it looks, but you do need to put a lot of work into making your marriage affair-proof. Just imagine how it will break your entire family’s heart if things get bad because of an affair that’s not even worth it in the first place.

But I do personally think that no matter how many temptations are laid down before you – you will not be ‘tempted’ to cheat if you are conscious about how your actions will affect the feelings of your partner.

According to emotional health adviser Ms. Cyprah, there are four main reasons why we are cheaters:

1. Loss of attraction & communication

Here, Ms. Cyprah explains how when one’s look wanes, the physical attributes which initially attracted you to another person will slowly fade as well. When this happens, your communication suffers and you will find your partner ‘lacking’ in many respects.

2. Lack of gratitude & appreciation

If you take for granted the words “Thanks” and “You look great” – our partners would assume that we do not appreciate them anymore. When this inner resentment is kept – you will reach a boiling point which might cause you to be unfaithful.

3. Lack of affirmation

If you say “I love you” five times a day and your husband does not even say it back to you at least once – that is a glaring lack of affirmation. Remember that it takes two to work on any type of relationship. If your partners feels like he or she is the only one who is trying to make the relationship work – they will surely wonder whether being with you is worth it or not!

4. Loss of significance & value

You go into a relationship to feel loved, wanted and needed. If your partner does not make you feel any of these things – there is a tendency to go looking for it somewhere else. Think about it!

Respect and love begin with the self. If we have none, how can we give away any?

-Ms. Cyprah

Health.msn.com compiles the reasons behind a flagging sexual drive, as well as tips on how they can be handled. Here’s a brief look into some of them:

1. You’re too tired.

Whether it’s work issues, lack of sleep, the arrival of a new baby or just a lousy day at home – being too tired is one of the most overly used excuse for not having sex. It’s important to make time for it, and compromising with your husband or partner. Doing the nasty after exercise is also a great idea – you won’t be able to sleep anyway because of all that excess energy.

2. You’re bored.

If things get too much of a routine in bed – try reading some sex guide books or go into fantasy mode. Go dirty talking or relive the day when you first got together. A little variety in your bedroom habits is a must to revive that fire that you used to have when you first got together.

3. You’re in pain.

The experts recommend lubrication, using an estrogen cream, switching to another contraceptive and visiting a specialist if you are experiencing pain during sex.

Knowing exactly what the problem is will help you find the exact solution to revive your flagging sexual desire.