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Speed Read Feed for April 6, 2007

Dick Cheney unleashes on Dem’s and House leader Nancy Pelosi- Rush Limbaugh

12,000 more National Guard troops could be going to Iraq- NBC News

John Kerry and Newt Gingrich plan ‘Global Warming’ debate showdown- The Hill

Disney opens Fairy Tale Weddings to gay couples- Reuters

Cincinnati firefighter found in bikini complete with blonde wig- Cincinnati.com

Drug dispensing  tooth could be controlled by dialing *69 on cell phone- Local 6

Tony Blair denies he wrote letter of apology to Iran- Financial Times

Ford pays CEO $28 million dollars for four months of work- CNN Money

Justin Timberlake stressing over sex scene with Christina Ricci in upcoming film- Fox News

Betty Ford recovering in hospital after an unspecified surgery- MSNBC

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Ramblings from the Shack: Edition 1

Cameron Diaz is turning into Meg Ryan.

The Kentucky basketball job is not nearly the hot job it use to be.  Billy Donovan will be taking a step back to take the Wildcats job over his current gig at the University of Florida.

People complain about the lack of talent around Kobe Bryant but Lamar Odom is an all-star and first round picks Kwame Brown, Andrew Bynum, Luke Walton, Bryan Cook, Aaron McKie, Chris Mihm, Lamar Odom, Vladimir Radmanovic and Sasha Vujacic.  All higher picks than the supporting cast Michael Jordan played with the majority of his career.

The Florida Gators Joakim Noah will be a bust in the NBA.

Why did they ever cancel The Golden Girls?

Google’s Gmail is slowly taking over and changing the way everyone does email.

I have never seen a more pathetic group of women than those on The Bachelor.

Ohio State’s Greg Oden is someone’s grandfather.

If Britney Spears was a beer she would be an Old Milwaukee.

If Paris Hilton were a cigarette she would be a Virginia Slim.

Rosie O’Donnell is on the verge of having as many enemies as George W. Bush.

If you are dating someone with wallpaper in their house then they are too old for you.

There is not a good actor or actress in Hollywood under the age of 30.

More movies are made in Vancouver, Canada and Louisiana than in Hollywood.

Blockbuster has out netflixed Netflix.

Rosie Shows Her Butt Again

Rosie O’Donnell must have very few friends. She is vile, full of hatred, and attacks anything that is edible. Her latest outburst is against Bill O’Reilly who stated last week that ABC should fire Rosie from The View for her damaging comments against the military and United States. Here is a look at what O’Donnell said today about O’Reilly and News Corp boss Rupert Murdoch.

Rosie O’Donnell spat back at conservative talk-show pugilist Bill O’Reilly after he called for her firing from ABC last week, comparing him to a character in George Orwell’s “1984″ who is “a fattish … man of paralyzing stupidity, a mass of imbecile enthusiasms.”

She didn’t reserve her fire for O’Reilly, however. On her blog at Rosie.com, Ro accused O’Reilly of being a totalitarian puppet of News Corp. chairman Rupert Murdoch, as she put it, in her lower-case verse, “like 1984/molding the facts/2 suit the needs/of big brother rupert.”

Well, Bill O. did go after Ro at least, as TMZ noted last week, calling Rosie “nutty” and “irresponsible” and suggesting that ABC should oust her from the show. Rosie went all literary-nasty on O’Reilly, comparing him to Parsons, a fellow employee of protagonist Winston Smith, whom Orwell says is “one of those completely unquestioning, devoted drudges on whom, more even than on the thought police, the stability of the Party depended.”

I believe everyone might want to tune into the factor tonight on Fox News (8pm EST) to see what Big Bill has to say in response to Rosie’s unstable ramblings.  Rosie would attack her own family if it meant more face time on TV for her.  Pretty sick that ‘The View’ is so desperate for ratings that they continue to let this beast appear on the show no matter who she attacks or how vile she is in doing so.

Hollywood March Madness Championship Match: Brit v. Jacko

Women’s #1 seed Britney Spears will face 34 men’s seed Michael Jackson to determine who is Hollywood’s Maddest Celebrity. Jacko beat Rosie O’Donnell (55% – 45%) to advance to the finals to face Spears, who beat Lindsay Lohan (72% – 28%), in the Championship game.

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Vote and decide the final winner of Hollywood March Madness. Will Wacko Jackso upset the Queen of Craziness Britney Spears?

Michael beat Brandon Davis, Tom Cruise and Rosie O’Donnell to reach the finals.

Britney beat Madonna, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan to reach the finals.


Click to View Complete Hollywood March Madness Bracket

BumpCrack Links 72

  • John Travolta is another environmental hypocrite- Allie is Wired
  • Natalia Bush comes complete with punching bags- Backseat Cuddler
  • Chris Sligh wins $50 bet from Phil Stacey on ‘Idol‘- Celebrity Smack!
  • Now you can smell like Nicole Richie if you desire- Celebslam
  • George Hamilton could become new host of Price is Right- Dlisted
  • Jenna Jameson unhappy about botched vaginoplasty- Gone Hollywood
  • Rose McGowan is a lot sexier than I had been led to believe- Hollywood Backwash
  • Leonardo Dicaprio is planning to marry his Israeli model girlfriend- Ninja Dude
  • Porn star Stormy Daniels puts some clothes on (but just a bikini)- Pink Meat Company
  • Christina Ricci’s Louis Vuitton ads are airbrushed to the max- Right Celebrity
  • Lindsay Lohan and tight t-shirts will always grab you a link- Sleazy Celebs

Hollywood Final Four Madness: Jacko v. Rosie

In today’s final four matchup (2) Rosie O’Donnell will face (4) Michael Jackson. In the first final four game pop tart (1) Britney Spears beat (2) Lindsay Lohan in a battle of drunks by a score of 90 (72%) – 35 (28%).

The winner of the O’Donnell/Jackson matchup will face Britney Spears starting on Monday in the Hollywood March Madness National Championship.

Everyone knows Rosie O’Donnell and her mental instabilities. Her feud with Donald Trump, her co-host Elizabeth and battle with American Idol regarding Frenchie Davis and Antonella Barba.

Michael Jackson has helped define crazy for nearly two decades now. No matter if he is guilty or innocent of molesting little boys most will agree that he has a very peculiar relationship with pre-pubescent boys and plastic surgeons.

A strong case can be made for either Rosie or Michael but you get to vote and decide the crazier of the two and who will move on to face Baldie Spears in the finals.

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Will Sanjaya Actually Go Tonight?

I would bet a lot of money that Sanjaya Malakar will not be voted off of American Idol tonight. Every AI hater and unconventional person will be casting a vote for Sanjaya. I say this even after the latest Bumpshack poll that shows that 73% of respondents believe he should be voted off.

However the poll I posted is inverted in relation to the way they do the actually voting. It is a lot easier for Sanjaya to stay on when people are voting for their favorite. If America was voting for who should be kicked off the show Sanjaya would have been gone weeks ago.

Other results from the Bumpshack poll (sample size:103) have Haley Scarnato (12%) as the second most likely to go home. The rest of the votes went to Chris Sligh (6%), Phil Stacey (3%), Jordin Sparks (3%), Chris Richardson (2%), Gina Glocksen (1%), and LaKisha Jones (1%).

I believe the bottom two tonight will be Haley Scarnato and Phil Stacey or perhaps Chris Sligh.

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all womens talk

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