8 Love Tips for Dating a Man with Kids ...

By Heather

Have you been trying to find tips for dating a man with kids but can't find ones that suit your situation? Tips for dating a man with kids that actually work are hard to come by. Kids can complicate things, if you don't know exactly how to insert yourself into their relationship or even how to handle kids at all. So girls, if you are dying to date a guy, but he has a kid and you don't know how to handle it, take a look below!

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1

Be Stable

Being stable is absolutely one of the most important things in the world that you can be with kids. This is one of the most important tips for dating a man with kids. After all, you don't want to be off-the-wall and unstable – kids need someone solid. Remember girls, stability is the key in any relationship that involves kids.

2

Don't Meet the Kids until You Are Serious with Him

You never, ever want to meet the kids unless you are serious with the guy. This tip for dating a man with kids is key, girls! Why would you ever want to disturb the guy's relationship with his kids by meeting them, if you aren't serious? Make sure that things are moving in the right direction before meeting his kids!

3

Don't Compete

Girls, this is the biggest problems that a lot of women have when they are dating a man with kids: competing for attention. A man with kids is absolutely going to choose the kids over you. This is something that you are going to have to deal with and something that you are going to have to accept.

4

Don't Come on Too Strong

Never, especially with the kids, come on too strong. You don't have to be their BFF right off the bat, girls. Just play it cool and calm, that way they will come to you and draw your personality out of you. Remember, you don't want to instantly believe that you are besties with the man's kids!

5

No Competing with the Mom

Another person that you aren't going to want to compete with is the mom. The mom – or the man's ex – is always going to be in their life, girls, you are going to have to deal with that. They have an unbreakable bond and you never, ever want to try to get in between that. Remember, it can cause a lot of conflict if you try to get between them.

Famous Quotes

Happiness depends upon ourselves.

Aristotle
6

Be Respectful

Always make sure that you are respectful not just to the kids, but also to his relationship with his ex and to him. You've got to make sure that you aren't butting in or trying to 'mother' the kids right away. You've got to ease into everything, remember that!

7

Never Mess up a Visitation

When it comes to visitations, you've got to make sure that you never, ever make him miss a visitation. You don't know how their relationship was and if it was messy. When kids are involved, you've got to make sure that visitations are happening and that you aren't interfering.

8

Pace Your Involvement

Finally, always make sure that you are pacing your involvement with the kids! You don't want to immediately assume that you are their second parent. Instead, just make sure that you are pacing exactly how involved you are in the actual parenting.

These are all of my tips for dating a man with kids, have you ever done it? Would you ever be able to date someone with a kid? I don't know if it's right for me, but if I found the right person? Maybe! Who knows!

Feedback Junction

Where Thoughts and Opinions Converge

I'm dating a guy that has a 5 year old kid. Me and him are only 22 years old. He was dating the girl while he got her pregnant . They broke up as soon as he was born. Now that holt has a kid with another guy . We get him every other weekend . I'm not going to lie I do get jealous when we het him because I'm use to having my BFs attention all the time and when we have him I don't get it I feel like I shouldn't be there sometimes . The little boy likes me a lot . My bf includes me in all his plans . I know my bf loves me and I love him too but is just hard. I want to be with my bf forever but I feel like this is the main problem I need to get use to it . I need to learn not to get mad and jealous when we have his kid.. Need advice ASAP .. We get his kid this weekend

I am on my way to a 3 year relationship with a man who has a boy of about 6 years old. I love love them both incredibly, and I don't think his ex wife was ever a concern for me; I'm secure in my relationship, even though silly things can make me behave insecurely on occasion (I am a woman after all!!) I think it takes a certain amount of patience and empathy to be able to have a good relationship with a man with children... Good luck to anyone out there wanting to go there :)

I feel I can relate somewhat to your current issues & concerns, being a woman who dates a man (2 yrs. divorced) & has a 3 yr. old daughter. Several unfortunate concerns have surfaced due to the child in the last few months, & I sincerely hope to find solutions for my relationship, which started out so incredibly wonderful & has lasted a year already. I, too, often feel marginalized or shut out (by no fault of his own), & try to make myself invisible so he doesn't lose time & connection with her. However, I'm realizing our conversations & interactions are less about us, & more about the ex or his daughter's best interests. I also need some insight as to whether I should be concerned or just let it pass (hopefully). He's about to have her for a month, & she's been sleeping in bed w/ him since he got over nights, I worry that might cause problems when we need to sleep in the same bed, & she becomes possessive &/or jealous about my presence. I can definitely see that creating conflict, since I have no children (want 1) & therefore, no one else to shower with affection or receive love from. Regarding your issues, I (as an slightly inexperienced gf) would say that you & he ought to speak calmly & respectfully about it, & hopefully he can inform his ex that you are a great influence & the child may be doing some unnecessary drama/conflict, for attention or some other reason. I think you & I both shouldn't have to shut down or feel unimportant; it's just hard to not receive attention & affection from the man we love. Maybe patience is the answer, & lots & lots of understanding/empathy (which I can also use from him at times). :)

Im dating a divorced guy with 3kids, twin girls (6) and a boy (8). We love eachother and plan to get married and have our own kids but i get a little worried sometimes if im doing the right thing cos our jobs make us travel alot and when he's with his kids we can hardly communiatr cos they want all his attention.. Dont know what to do.

I wish I could send this to my dads girlfriend. She really is a witch.

I think these are good tips but I'm having a little trouble with the last one. I'm trying to figure out how to pace my involvement & sometimes it can be hard & confusing. Our back story is more complicated but we've only technically been dating for about 3 months. He thinks I'm amazing with his 4&1/2 yr old daughter & that I understand their relationship & my involvement better than anyone he's dated before but I'm still sort of searching for my place. We're also going to be moving in together at the end of March so I think things are going to be coming to the forefront for me a little sooner than normal.

I have been currently dating a guy for almost a year, he has two small children, a one year old and an almost 3 year old daughter with Down syndrome. The mother is young, she is 19 years old and very irresponsible who cheated on him and tries to get in our relationship. How do I deal with a relationship like this, I really love him, but I hate the fact that I have to deal with this.

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