• John Mayer and Jessica Simpson more brunette couple- Allie is Wired
• Porn star with initials of STD- Backseat Cuddler
• Kate Moss without makeup is mossy- Celebrity Smack!
• Britney Spears chomps down at Ruth’s Chris- Fatback and Collards
• Reese Witherspoon and Jake Gyllenhaal are dating- Hollywood Backwash
• Monica’s highly pissed about her soaps- Monica Monroe
• Lauren Conrad has a sex tape- Ninja Dude
• More sexy shots of Abigail Clancy- Pink Meat Company
• Gina Glocksen is goth wanna-be- Right Celebrity
• Sexy Gemma Atkinson gets loaded- Sleazy Celebs

Front runners LaKisha Jones, Melinda Doolittle and Jordin Sparks continue to be just that on American Idol. Blake Lewis and Chris Richardson were impressive as far as the guys go. Probably the contestant in the most danger tomorrow night will be Haley Scarnato or Phil Stacey.

Blake Lewis- B+ I am not a big Blake fan but I thought he did a pretty good job with the swing classic ‘Mack the Knife’. I thought he had his best fashion style for week. I still believe Blake is the perfect match for Seacrest.

Phil Stacey- A- I am not much of a Phil Stacey fan either but these songs are right up his alley. He did a very impressive job although Randy and Simon seemed to disagree.

Melinda Doolittle- A+ Dr. Doolittle continues to shine and be my favorite. She sang ‘I Got Rhythm’ and Melinda definitely does indeed have rhythm. She is going to be hard to beat.

Chris Richardson- C+ Homeboy Timberlake was a let down this week. I thought he was under appreciated up until this point but tonight he seemed to be over appreciated by the judges in my opinion. I didn’t find it to be horrible but Chris has had better performances.

Jordin Sparks- B+ She is the young prodigy that could shock the world and win American Idol. She reminds me of a young Muhammad Ali (not sure where that came from). They say she is 17 but I think she has a forged birth certificate. She is light years ahead of any 17-year-old I have dated. Her performance was very strong tonight.

Gina Glocksen- D- What the heck was Gina thinking? I think ‘Smile’ is one of my least favorite songs in the world. She tries to be all urban alternative and she came out singing a song by Charlie Chaplin that Michael Jackson covered on HIStory. The tongue ring has to go. Although the rest of her makeover was an upgrade.

Sanjaya Malakar- B- LOL, I am glad I type this as I am watching AI. The pencil thin mustache and white suit about made me fall off the sofa laughing. Not a bad performance by Hairjaya. I found his vocals to be pretty good, he danced with Paula and he pimped a white suit….what could be better than that? He also got a hair cut and straightening job.

Haley Scarnato- B She is either really good or really bad. Tonight she is pretty freaking good. She is good with a cheesy Disney song or classical song. Everything was good about her performance except her green dress which did everything to highlight all that is wrong with her figure…..which isn’t much.

LaKisha Jones- A+ It is a good thing KiKi doesn’t look like Antonella Barba or Haley Scarnato because if she did they would have to cancel the rest of the show. It would be that big of a blowout. It is almost like she is making love to the microphone when she sings. Her stylist deserves a raise as she continues to look more and more the part of a sexy diva each week.

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More of the usual this week on American Idol. The same ones shined and yet another queer hairstyle from Sanjaya Malakar.  The Bumpwife immediately said that boy needs a therapist. You know I think she is right. She actually use to be in his camp, but her jaw was on the floor with Sanjaya came out to perform last night.  I didn’t like Jordin Sparks performance at all but the judges loved it.

Goods: Melinda Doolittle, Gina Glocksen, LaKisha Jones, Blake Lewis, Chris Richardson

Decents: Chris Sligh, Phil Stacey

Bads: Haley Scarnato, Sanjaya Malakar, Jordin Sparks

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I was a bit distracted trying to watch this week’s episode of American Idol. From what I was able to see I was most impressed by Sanjaya, Haley, Chris and Melinda. The bottom three vote getters this week will be Phil Stacey, Gina Glocksen and Sanjaya Malakar.

ELIMINATION DANGER: Phil Stacey

Melinda Doolittle- A - DooDoo continued to shine as she sang ‘Home’. She is my personal favorite.

LaKisha Jones- C - Everyone wishes they could sing like this girl but tonight was not that impressive to me. Simon was right on with his commentary. It doesn’t matter she will be back next week and is the favorite to win it all.

Stephanie Edwards- B- - She is always overshadowed. I don’t remember much about her performance. She needs some hair.

Haley Scarnato- A- - As Simon said not many people will be talking about her singing today and that is true. I have no clue what she sang because she was teasing the audience with that sexy figure of hers. She has dumped her good girl ‘Disney’ image.

Gina Glocksen- F - Simply the worst female performance of the night. The only thing worse than her singing was her new hairdo. It looked like my sisters Barbie doll after she chopped her hair off with scissors then dipped Barbie’s head in her Kool-Aid. She could also better enunciate her words if she would remove her tongue ring before performing.
Jordin Sparks- A+ - They need to check her birth certificate. She is in the Doolittle, Lakisha category and is going to stay there.

Blake Lewis- C - The cockiest contestant for sure. He was better than last week, but his singing leaves a lot to be desired. More likely to be a music producer.

Chris Richardson- A- - He continues to be the male favorite in my opinion. He seems to get better each week.

Sanjaya Malakar- B+ - WOW! Sanjaya came out loose and sang like a rock star. His performance blew the judges away…as far as where did that come from factor. I believe he will be back.

Phil Stacey- F - Appeared to be very flat and is the most boring contestant remaining.

Chris Sligh- B- - Nice rebound after a sucky singing performance last week. He went in the crowd and seemed a bit inspired.