There are a few things that men tend to be better at then women, and one of these is critical thinking. Whether its receiving criticism ourselves or criticizing others, we tend to really struggle…and it’s no wonder why. After all, no one enjoys criticism! To rule our lives and jobs effectively, though, it’s a talent we have to have. Here are my eight tips to make it much more painless, whether you are the giver or the receiver…

1. State The Facts

  Photo Credit: Christine Lebrasseur

Think about what it is you need to say, and write it down in bullet points. For example, if you need to criticize your relationship with your partner, give a factual reason why. “I feel that you don’t put any effort into the relationship anymore” will get a much better response then an emotional rant. In the same vein, if it is a work problem, talk in facts too.

2. Add Some Empathy

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Then add what you want to the conversation. It isn’t fair to make people guess! Think about the fact you presented, and how that could be solved. “This probably wasn’t intentional, and to fix it I think that we need too….” will give the person some empathy, and a platform to start to solve the problem from. It’ll also give you a ‘checkpoint’ to mark improvements from.

3. Don’t Say Always

  Photo Credit: ckaiserca

Always is an incredibly long time! Don’t use always or never in your criticism. “You never…” is going to make the person feel under attack, and immediately go defensive. If you need to use times, use frequently, or sometimes. This is probably much more accurate anyway, and will stop you using ‘negative’ words!