Everyone dreams of having a successful, happy relationship, correct? Where there is a happy relationship, there is a successful relationship. When I look at the statistics of divorces in the United States, I do get a bit depressed. People don’t seem to be taking marriage seriously anymore. Take California for an example, where the average marriage only lasts for five years. Nationwide, forty three percent of the marriages end within those first fifteen years. Second and third marriages end in divorce seventy percent of the time. It is clear that we are not handing our relationships the right way. Below, I am going to give you some of my tips to having a successful relationship and marriage.
11. Communication and trust.
No relationship can succeed without these two. You need to be able to talk to your partner about anything right from sex to your future plans to your fears. And trust is just as important. Not just to trust your partner but to be trustworthy. Remember once lost, trust is hard and I mean HARD to win back.
10. It starts with you.
Abraham Lincoln once stated that you are as happy as you make up your mind to be. Throughout times, research has proved that happiness is a state of being. Happiness is not of doing, achieving or having. I guess what I’m trying to say is that nothing you do, no amount of Manolo Blahniks or dresses, no amount of money can truly make you happy unless you choose to be happy.
Photo Credit: Panda Cat Baby ★
9. There is you, there is him/her and then there is we.
You do not have to be known only as your spouse’s husband or wife. You have an identity of your own. And it’s important to go out and do your own thing every once in a while. Spend time with the girls. Shop alone. Take up a new hobby. Alone time is important. At the same time, make it a point to do things together. You are in a marriage afterall. Find that balance between “I” and ”
Photo Credit: Twiggy *
I appreciate number 9. That is my biggest fear about marriage – losing semblance of myself – my identity. I mean it’s far off in the distance but all my friends are tying to knot as of late so I’ve been thinking about it a lot.
Number 5 is great too.
Also, a tad arbitrary and irrelevant to your post’s theme, but love the eye makeup in number 8’s photo! :)
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Hehe theo,
yeah I love the makeup too. You know what, I have a LOT of people around me getting married too.. and it sort of scares me. I know that I am NOT ready to even commit to tying the knot, forget actually doing it. But now this is more food for thought!
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Communication is the key….. :) if I would known that ….maybe I wouldn’t have spoiled a 8 years old relationship. And another thing….you should never lie :)
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Hey tavia,
I agree.. communication and honesty would be two of the most important things to make things work.. and don’t worry honey, i’ve messed up too on my part in relationships that mattered.
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communication is important. My ex and I used to talk about everything but we just didn’t understand each other. We lacked that mutual understanding.
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Hey Fatima,
I’m sorry that things didn’t work out between the two of you.
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Communication and trust matter alot…no matter wherever u are and whatever you are doing…things change..tym changes..but trust always remains…bcz its there inside the BOTH…and yes the 3 magical words :) ..no 1 can deny the effect…
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you’re right Maj, Trust is paramount all throughout.. and the thing is, you can’t really take the trust for granted – like all other things that are earned, trust can be lost too! so keep working on it people!
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This is such a truthful post!
No matter how much a couple is in love, sometimes it’s not enough!
Communication is an important asset for a realtionship to stay alive. Trust is completly fundamental! As without trust one can’t live with each other!
Leaving the past behind is improtant. No one should reproach one another with things done in the past. The past should be put to rest and another chapter should begin!
Remembering why you got married in the first place or why you’re with that person is an improtant factor. Every couple has it’s bad times for sure! No one is perfect and every one gets those moments when you ask what am I doing!?
But remembering the reason should be good for you to calm down and see things clearly!
And than of course love is improtant. But without many factors love is incomplete!
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Hey Xannyyy,
that’s really well said – Without many factors, love is incomplete! you’re right about leaving the past where it belongs – in the past. I know of cases (one being with me too), where the bf or the gf has ‘forgiven’ the other for some mistake(s) and continued the relationship to only constantly bring it up as a reminder. That’s not how things should be – you either trust the person or you don’t!
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Sheila,
Yeah it’s mnot healty for eather person to contine to remind one another of the past. Either you’re reliving your past or you are continuing with your future!
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I lost my boyfriend from a lack of communication.
He had been complaining I wasn’t talking to him enough, so the day before he broke up with me I decided and tried every possible way to talk to him as much as possible and he would walk away. So, five hours later he had his friend break up with me for him, infront of all my friends. Great, huh? Aha…
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Hey Zoey,
That’s a really sad way to have someone break up with you. Though honey, even I’ve learnt the hard way that communication in a relationship should not be confined to just one odd long conversation, but more of an honest, open conversation every day about everything in life! I hope you fare better in your next relationship (and so do I)!
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Agreed Xannyyy,
now if only all of us can clearly separate the two!
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