In honor of April Fools Day, here’s a list of foolish and foolhardy actions that are a foolproof way to make getting through airport security as painfully slow as possible:

1. Wear metal studded pants.  You can’t take them off and put them through the metal detector, so they’re going to have to wand you.  What were you thinking?
2. Leave liquids in your carry on bags.  Unless you’ve been living under a rock, you should know about the security directive limiting liquids and ...